You Remind Me

Kind of interesting, a little different from my usuall, but not much:)

Black and Blue

Beat up my heart

These Inky purple bruises

Stain the pages

Of my life

Don’t really feel like

Putting up much of a fight

Anymore

 

Drown myself

In my own words

Like a waterfall of glass

Dripping slowly

Through my soul

Thinking maybe that

It’s time

To just let go

 

The rocks far below me

The edge of the sea

Calm turned to storm

Echoes of all that I used to be

Rising up in your eyes

Like the moon o’er the night sky

 

When I feel like giving up

Letting go

Ready to die

You pick me up

And tell me I live

I must live

Then you remind me why

Author's Note

Like I said, it's a little different... It's a Frankenstien piece... What do you think?

Reviews

[Rob Santana]

Reads really well, good flow, "these inky purple bruises" "drown myself in my own words" I really like those lines, clever wording. Good job Raven.

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

Thanks Creeper:) I'm glad you liked it:) And I happen to really like the wording of this one myself, although I like the part about the waterfall of glass dripping through my soul best:) But yeah, Thanks man:)

[Holly Mason]

very creative way to get your words across
content is well placed and reads through nicely
I am glad you have someone to pick you up and remind you why you must live
thank you much for sharing

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

Thanks:)

[James Hanna-Magill]

Dear Amenti

First reactions from someone who will always tell you the best and the worst, the good and the bad, the flawless and the flawed:

1) Immediate appreciation of how accomplished this is as a piece of writing; style; use of colour; and

2) Stark straight recognition of the point you make.

Read my writing, Understanding, Split and more and you will see why; read my profile.

My best answer to your quandary is never, ever, ever give up. Never give up living or the desire to live. We only have the one shot at life. Make it count not just for yourself but for others, your readers, humanity.

Educate us. Teach us from your own life and words.

A link to a song which should give us all hope, from Micahel Stipe, R.E.M ‘Everybody Hurts’:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijZRCIrTgQc

Best wishes

James

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

Damn:) Thanks:) And I surely will read your writing:)

[Heromen Selena]

I'm not family with Frankenstien except the movies, but this was a beautiful poem. The imagry in the beginning with the bruises and connecting it to ink was a really could idea. This was great, keep it up!!

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

Thank you:) I love connecting blood to ink in anyway possible, I know that might be creepy, but I love it:) And what I meant about Frankenstien was that it was a bunch of random thrown away pieces that came together to form something new:)

[Heromen Selena]

Oh wow!! Then the deep meaning behind that just blew over my head. But that's really cool :)

[skyelight]

I agree with Kriss_Rose very sad and beautiful :) Love your play on the colors especially the blue, being my fav color;)
Great job!

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

Blue is my favorite color as well:)

[skyelight]

:)!

[Kriss_Rose]

beautiful. I love the vivid imagery. Its sad but beautiful. a good write

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

Thanks:) I'm glad you like it:)

[Kriss_Rose]

this inspired me to write my poem You Save me :)

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

I'll have to read it:) That's really cool:) Thank you for telling me that:) Have you posted it?

[Kriss_Rose]

I did :)

[Elizabeth Porterfield]

Yeah, I read it a second ago:) Great work!!!