October Morning

October Morning

A Poem by Elie Marie
"

october morning of leaves

"

Leaves are dancing in the wind,

pirouetting past my window.

The wind howls,

asking to be noticed.

The sky is trying,

trying for that perfect snugly October day.

It's a drizzle, nothing more.

But as I stand gazing at the world,

I notice the wind

I see how beautiful the dancing leaves are.

Anyone should be so lucky for this.

But I,

I am a zombie

Numb to all here.

My heart is elsewhere,

flutters fill my soul,

but my flutters come from the other side of the ocean.

© 2015 Elie Marie


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Reviews

The poem took the reader to thoughts and people missed. I liked how you led to the good ending.
"My heart is elsewhere,
flutters fill my soul,
but my flutters come from the other side of the ocean."
Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

Posted 9 Years Ago


Very nice imagery, I like the way it describes surroundings and the way a heart can disconnect from them, lost in its own world. Very nice.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Elie Marie

9 Years Ago

thank you.
i like ti! the fall is very much my favorite time of year followed by spring i like these lines .. simply stated but there is strong interaction between the speaker and nature .. one possible editing error do you mean past instead of pass? .. is there another way to say window in your 8th line rather than repeating it?
this with the wind and the leaves and everything else is perfect says i:
"but my flutters come from the other side of the ocean."
E.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Elie Marie

9 Years Ago

yes, thank you.... it took me this long to go back and fix my mistake and look at line 8. thanks for.. read more

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180 Views
3 Reviews
Rating
Added on December 14, 2014
Last Updated on January 31, 2015
Tags: fall, autumn, leaves, october

Author

Elie Marie
Elie Marie

London, United Kingdom



About
I write to breathe. I write for me, not you. I write to stay alive. I've never gotten feedback or been part of anything like this, I'd love to hear what anyone other than me thinks of my words.. more..

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