The best mother in the world

Journal entry

I have the best mother in the world. Among all other things she has done for me this weekend, like taking my hand instead of asking when she sees the pain in my face (sometimes i wish she'd ask tho), or going for long walks with me, buying lots of food and cooking with me, and pouring me glasses of wine (but not enough), she asked me when i was sitting solemnly reading an article "you're not thinking of becoming a boy are you?" and I was silent for a moment and then said "i don't think so…but if i did, would you still love me?", "of course i would" she answered without the slightest hesitation in her voice. Another day we were on an evening walk and she jokingly said as a response to our talk about my non-existent career as an artist "lets find you a rich man who would pay for you doing art" and i responded "i don't want a man", and she said "a rich woman then, lets find you a rich woman. This is how you should go abouts to find one…." . And I thought that I have never really come out as bi -or omnisexual, or gender-queer, but that this is the reason I never had to or never will have to. I have never been taught to feel or be restricted in my personal and emotional journeys however far they take me. And I can leave tomorrow realising I am not going to fight a fight within myself that don't really exist, and never have. This has always been me, and nothing has changed.