I slam the bathroom door shut. I start pulling my clothes off, tears streaming down my face. Anger rising as I fling the shower door open and jump in. Hot water hits my body and my head leans against the shower wall. Razor in hand, I flick the top piece off with my thumb. I'm sobbing, head still in place, I lift my left arm up and bring the razor to my wrist. Within seconds the razor is down my forearm and blood is streaming out of my arm. The water is washing it away making to seem as if the long slice into my forearm is invisible. The blood is flowing towards the drain and I'm feeling myself slowly sick down to the shower floor. I lie there peacefully, happy almost, that I'm losing consciousness, but scared of where I'm going.
I open my eyes and it's white all around me. I'm wearing a silk robe, I roll over on my back and I'm on sand. I lay there feeling the ocean water touch my toes. It begins to rain and I start laughing. I'm here and I'm finally away from the life I never wanted. I'm 14 and I'm in heaven and it's so beautiful. A young girl with red hair is standing above me. She's smiling and holds her hand out. I take it and she helps me to my feed. We walk down the beach holding hands. I feel like we're going to be good friends.