Love

Love is like life

Possible it is not without pain

You sometimes fail, sometimes succeed

Can be a dismal discomfiture or a treacly treat

If you stay on the right lane, there are thousand things to gain

If not, you get less sane and incur into baleful bane

Among us men both good and bad are rife

It lies with us to overcome its unpalat'ble sides in our life

To truely taste the total topping tang of a togetherness called love

As the first thing must end imperatively over and above

Whereas true love is an immortal gift no one can ever rive

Author's Note

Please let me know which parts are bad English so that I can improve it! ;)

Reviews

[jesserose99]

I don't know about the bad English but I like what you have to say. A little confused about 'If not, you get less sane and incur into baleful bane, Among us men both good and bad are rife'. It probably isn't you though and is me. Could you give me a little more information as to what you are saying there. Very creative though...like the poem very much.

[Eichendorff]

Hey,
thanks for your review! It's the first one that I have received so far!
The part you were confused about: I tried to express that love can have two different effects: either a positive one which makes you happy and sublime and one which drives you crazy, maybe even makes you obsessed. Both kinds of effects are existent, so there are those who are negatively affected affected and those who are positively affected.
I'll also read your poems and review them :)
I'd be happy if you also read some of my other poems :)

[jesserose99]

See you have a greater command of the language I think then I. That makes perfect since now. I will definitely read your other work..gladly!