A Good Confession

Confession is good for the soul

A Good Confession

A boy steps into the confessional booth at church and kneels. The old priest is fast asleep and snoring behind the screen partition as the boy begins.

Bless me father for I have sinned

It has been two weeks since my last confession

I threw Mary down the stairs

I drank milk from the container

I pushed an old lady in front of a moving train

Several times and she did not die

There must be something wrong with her

I also touched myself in an impure manner once

Who am I kidding? I did it thousands of times

And enjoyed every minute

Bless me father for I have sinned

I blew up the town bridge with dynamite

And forgot to brush my teeth and do the dishes

The truth is; the bridge had it coming

Father forgive me for all the sins I do

Including the pack of lies I just told you