A Better Education

Altered states of being

A Better Education

According to the weather reports, there is a 100% chance of asteroid showers this afternoon, by noon time to be precise. The locals figured that must have been a verbal mistake. They probably meant to say meteor showers. John Waters was just rising with the sun on this perfectly ordinary day. There were no clouds, no wind and no volcano movement to speak of, which was surprisingly odd because the region experienced hyper volcanic eruptions practically every day of the week.

In recent times the people in the valley had become sensitive, even paranoid about the upsurge in peculiar happenings in recent weeks. Most of the inhabitants in the valley of Golden Glades were students at the near by University. Lucky for them and as chance would have it, the professors at Four Corners U were teaching students about social relativism this semester. They tell their trusting underlings everything they perceived about the world was and is wrong. A new day has dawned on humanity. They would lecture them for hours on how to save them from themselves and from God as well (at no extra cost.) Their minds were filled with wondrous candy coated thoughts and ideas to live by. It so happens that all things in nature, seen and unseen are not strange things but nature expressing that which is conceivable, as they are meant to be, without question. The law of nature dictates, “there is no law.” Chaos rules and we follow.

All things are “normal” by virtue of being in existence in the first place. A tree does not ask nature for permission to be a tree. A person does not ask to be born. Things happen or they do not happen. There is no right or wrong as far as nature is concerned.

If something is in existence it was meant to be there by the forces of nature with a little push from chance on to the stage and theater of randomness from the open void which is a friend to all. Strange things are not really strange. Our perspectives are wrong or misguided. We are expected to accept everyone and everything as it is. There is no good or bad either. There is no cause and effect. There is simply effect and it nature and it is there in abundance for all to enjoy. All religions are right. All political parties are correct. Criminals are not good or evil. They are simply criminals trying to get by in this world with their natural skills. We must love them for what they are. They must be allowed to vote without having to pay for their crimes first. Some parties get the idea. Others do not. We must tolerate everyone. The good book and the bad book say as much.

People are just different. They have a right to express themselves in their own terms and we need to accept them as they are. All sex orientations are correct. The word “Yes” can mean no and no can be yes without judgment, without prejudice. Who are we to say what is right and what is wrong? Everything in nature is preordained to be as it is and must be accepted without question.

That was surely a welcome relief to the people of Golden Glades who were becoming confused by recent events, which were more than unusual to be sure. They were becoming lost with no direction to go. Worlds were turning upside down before their eyes.

Mr. Waters finally pulled himself together after a hearty breakfast and stepped outside into a glorious day filled with a blazing red sun, which was already well on its way, filling up the holes nature left behind from the night before, climbing higher in the sky, heating up the world in its usual manner. The road in front of him had turned an unrecognizable shade of neon orange. The root cellar, which stood low to his immediate left just outside his wooden porch steps was there with the door wide open. The cellar was used this time of year for growing mushrooms. On this particular day the mushrooms had apparently rolled themselves outside to enjoy the blistering hot sunlight and dry killer like desert air. If John had gotten another kind of education he would have seen this as a curious event and would have been concerned. His suspected mobile animated crop must have decided to abandon the cold dark place with its comfy cozy moist soil for another kind of environment. They must have been looking for something different. Since different is a good thing, John did not become apprehensive.

He looked up into the sky to see large yellow and blue objects, large lights heading his way, growing in size by the second, steadily, methodically towards him and the ground around him at incredible velocities. There were also thousands of wavy elongated streaming things streaking through the atmosphere. He marveled at the spectral display and was inclined to go inside to get his camera to capture the moment but he had no time to waste. Though he was mesmerized by the sights, his classes would be starting soon and he was demonstratively fastidious about being on time.

He drove his old jeep at breakneck speed out of the valley. After about three miles up the road there is a steep cliff wall that hugged the narrow dirt road he was traveling on. He had to come to a dramatic abrupt stop due to a herd of cattle marching off the cliff in front of him, moving and mooing from left to right directly in front of him. He could not imagine why they would be committing mass suicide. It did not matter. He did not want to be late for class. The jeep horn had no effect on the cows. There were no alternate roads to the school so he had to sit tight and practice patience. Waiting was not one of his finer attributes. One by one, sometimes two at time they marched off the cliff to the jagged rocks below to certain death.

Mr. Waters became bored after a while from watching the cows go over. It was worse than counting sheep. He yawned and nearly fell asleep but then something unusual happened. His anatomy began to change. In a matter of minutes his entire body had been transformed into a mechanical entity. His face was still humanoid but it had turned to a deep blue color. His eyes turned a deep turquoise green, an improvement over the ordinary dull brown ones he had just lost moments ago.

At first he was alarmed. The funny thing is, he still had feelings and his brain was still functioning the same as usual but it too had morphed into mechanical parts with transmitters, sensors and whirring sounds but still working to get his thoughts out. Thinking and original thoughts never came easy for John. The first thing that crossed his new fangled mind was, “Am I still going to have my soul? How can a machine have a soul? How did this happen? Does God like thinking machines?

The asteroid impacts started early. If you can't trust meteorologist who can you trust? They never were any good at predicting the rain and other weather so he guessed it was to be expected. There were bigger issues at hand.

The flood of cows finally came to an end. John continued on to the university. He wondered what the other students would think about his new look. He worried if his professors would punish him for his tardiness. It turns out that his body was still anatomically correct. Obviously he had lost his hair and his metallic head had a shimmering glow about it. There was no time to waste. He stepped on the gas and proceeded forward as if everything was normal. What else could he do? According to reliable sources everything is normal. What else could it be? Peculiar is the new norm apparently.

When he arrived on campus there were a few new changes. It had been leveled, totally devastated, totally gone. He suspected it was the work of the asteroids. He suspected that all of his friends and teachers were dead. He was right. They were. There was nothing left standing. If not for the intervention of the cattle he too would be gone.

On his way back home he observed other changes in the landscape. All of the trees and bushes had turned into blue metallic cubes. They looked beautiful, even stately, standing out on the blank horizon, rising against an altered sky of white. Yes. The sky was changed to a creamy milky white color. It was spectacular. You never know what nature is going to throw your way. It is true what they say. Life is something that happens to you while you make plans to do something else. You can only accept it and move on. It was and is good to be alive, even if you happen to be a sentient machine.

Mr. Waters was concerned about survival in his new state of being. Could he process food and water? Would he ever sleep again? Would he ever use the toilet again? What about pain? What about shaving? Shaving was a no brainer. (No hair. No problem.) He was now a conglomeration of tubes and wires and electrical components and almost completely metallic from head to toe.

Time passed. The world around him changed frequently to the point where it was unrecognizable as Earth. Oceans and lakes disappeared. Mountains and hills turned into monolithic jagged structures, translucent phantoms composed of solid crystal quarts and shiny new copper that reached a mile high into the newly formed atmosphere. People changed too. Most of them were now metallic men and women. They retained many of their human qualities and reasoning faculties. That was maybe good news.

There were still many teachers who survived to show human kind.....that is, machine kind, the error of their ways. Social relativism was needed more than ever. John was perplexed about his new self. There was no manual to show him or others how to repair or replace parts. What if he lost a limb or even an eye? How long might he live or function in this new existence? Do machines dream? Do they die? What about procreation? Would the family structure break down? Would society survive? There are still flesh and blood people in the world. Will the two factions work together or become fearful of one another and move apart or worse?

John Waters went about his newly created yet undeniably normal mundane life as usual. However there were some stark changes. He stopped eating, drinking and sleeping. He didn't miss any of those activities. In fact he was happy. Now he could get more things done in his life because the days never ended and he had boundless energy and strengths at his disposal 24 hours a day.

He could not wait to go back to his classes to have his head filled with all kinds of new ideas. He wondered if candy would taste so sweet. Education was always and will always be his passion.

The university was rebuilt and they brought in teachers from California and New York. He was not sure if that was a good idea. He was certain it would not save his soul. That was still a lingering haunting question. They were sure to alter his mechanical ego. Who ever heard of a liberal robot though? It does not matter. It is all relative. The important thing was that he seemed to be headed in the right direction, fully functional and with a purpose. (Not that there could be a right or wrong way) but he made his way to the newly constructed, “Computer One At Alter Church” run by the Divinity of The Most Holy Altered Ones.” He never missed church on Sundays. He was funny that way and he never missed class during the week. Being on time defined him and his machinery. Balance is everything when you are built that way.