I hate Soup

Fear of legal interpretations on soup consumption, Fear of viewing soup consumers. (forks are included.)

I Hate Soup

I hate soup!
No I don't
I love soup
Get your story straight
We are going before the judge today
He or she is probably judgmental
If they hate you more than the soup
I don't know what They'll do
If they love soup you can only pray for leniency
Claim insanity
It is only a lost day in court
Stay away from name brands before the law
Keep it simple
It is safer not to say Campbell's
Lipton is forbidden
You are being charged with complicity
Watching a full fledged felony in action
In broad day light is more than a misdemeanor
Someone dared to eat, to slurp their soup in public
Sipping it in plain view is a capital offense
On top of that a fork was used
Why oh why did you dine at the Greasy Spoon
What bad timing… What bad news
Now you have to pay
Soup crimes are severe in the light of day
Penalties for watching are much more graver
Not reporting it is simply crazy
I hate soup
I love soup
It does not matter
I'm being sued

Author's Note

Be prepared for the improper use of a fork. (Shelter your children.) Proper and Improper soup matters and manners are explored. Legal interpretations and fears surrounding the viewing of and consumption of soup are on display for the shock value, entertainment and amusement of all. (The author here is lobbying for the use of spoons...as well he should.

Reviews

[KWP]

All hail to the soup eaters!!! Or is it soup sippers? When is a soup not a soup? When you use a fork? When it's a wartime stew? How did ancient Indians from India used to eat soup when they alway only use their right hand to eat - or is it left - I guess they perhaps just sipped it from their terracotta pots - no hands no spoon - no fork - oh hell no - no FORK!

We live in times where we may be placed before a judge and we may need to defend ourselves against rightful, generational old soup partaking - this is a very good poem to keep me aware ... no if you will excuse me, there is still much to enquire about on the humble Spiced Pumpkin and Chickpea soup.

[Mary]

Ha Ha! Our country just might be headed in that direction! First soup, then stew, what's next? Lasagna? Well done!