Chapter 2: Plan for Eternal Retirement but without the Retirement Part: by Panic! At The Disco

"Let's get started," The woman said as she shuffled through some papers. Her slick black hair was in a tight bun, and she had white cold skin. Her reading glasses rested on the brink of her nose and were as stern as the rest of her. She had no color in her eyes, or by her, except for everything in the shades of gray.

"Iris? Iris," she snapped. Iris jumped at her stern voice, one of an iceberg.

"Y-yes...?" Iris timidly said as she sat in the chair. She felt like the principal was scolding her for breaking a window. It wasn't like she had done that before...

"Iris! Pay attention! This is exceedingly important!" She looked like she was going to hit Iris with a ruler.

"One question," Iris inquired. "What are we planning for exactly?"

"Well, it is pretty straight forward. Your death plan. It is much like your human's "insurance"." She said condescendingly in air quotes.

"Oh! So... It's an eternal retirement plan without the retirement part!" Iris thought she was Sherlocks Homes, or whoever that detective guy from English was. She was never good at English. Or math. Or science. Or social studies, PE, and basically every other class except art. Which she was marginally good at. 

“Uh…,” she glared to the side. “I guess.”

           “So… what are my options?” Iris hesitantly asked as she tried to look as formal as possible, whilst failing miserably. 

            The woman groaned as she shuffled some papers and adjusted her glasses. “So, based on your file you were an atheist. That opens up a lot of options for you, this means that you could go to heaven, hell, or afterlives of anything else for that matter

She kept talking and talking and talking about “planning” and “eternal future” and boring stuff like that. She sounded almost exactly like Iris’s guidance counselor. “Oh shoot I should be paying attention.” But the more she tried to pay attention, the less and less she heard. She just nodded and smiled like she heard every word. She was so screwed.

“Do you understand?” the woman said. Iris was so screwed. 

“Yes,” Iris lied.

“So, you are ready to make your decision?” The woman seemed anxious. 

“Um… sure.” She was dead. Iris was so dead. More than she already was.

“Oh thank ____!” She exclaimed, relieved. Again with nothing. 

“So… um…” She had to stall. Anything. “I really can't decide! Could I wait a bit longer, learn more about my options? I… want to make sure I'm making the right choice.” Thank whatever god there was, she was saved.

“Defiantly!” This was the happiest she ever had seen the woman. Her gray face glowed a slight pink. Very, very, slight. “As long as you get out of here. I want lunch,” she mumbled. 

“What?” Iris questioned.

“Nothing! Go right next door to the information office for everything you need! Now go! Go!” The woman pushed her out of the room. And with a bang of the door, she was back in the waiting room. It was empty, and the sign on the front desk stated it was a lunch break. She was alone. Iris walked toward the translucent doors. The gray light shone through, as she wondered what would lie ahead. Welp, I guess only me, and whoever you are reading this will know.