November 15th and 16th: Nights 16 & 15

I woke up in my room. My plain white walled room. I had an older TV and xbox gaming system. Books and DVDs were scattered all over my room and on the floor laid my dirty clothing. Posters of the bands "Paramore", "Mayday Parade", "Linkin Park", and "Framing Hanley" helped give my room the teenager angst it so desperately needed. I like my room though I never truly felt at home here. I knew it was my home but not my home. I lived here but my heart wasn't here. My large bed was warm and shaped in for my body. To top it off my room, was never my room. According to my parents I wasn't allowed to hang out anywhere but this room but they could walk in whenever they felt like it if I was or wasn’t home. 

I felt my face, I felt no head ache or any other pains. I knew the night before I was drinking at the party. So why wasn't I sick now? Normally if I decided to get drunk I planned on the next day of sleep. I was wide awake at nine am; I sat up and looked at my hands. My right wrist had a scar on it, like a crescent moon. I never remembered having a scar there. I stumbled out of bed and threw on a pair of jeans and t-shirt. I then looked for my cell, after a five minute hunting for it I gave up and I walked down stairs, my mother was making whole wheat pancakes. I sighed at the very thought, if you’re going to eat pancakes they should be white and fluffy. She spotted me coming down the steps. 

"You're up early. You want some breakfast?" She asked hopefully. She wanted me to say yes and suddenly love the taste of whole wheat pancakes I disappointed her with my reply.

"Can't, have to go up with meet with Serena. Sorry." I slipped on my shoes. My mother handed me a napkin with turkey bacon and a banana. I took it and kissed my mom on the cheek then headed out the door. The day was looking to be sunny and bright maybe one of the last days like this before the rainy cold weather of Oregon settled in. I walked down the street to Serena’s house and knocked on the door. Serena’s step father let me in and I ran up the stairs to Serena’s bedroom. Serena was under the covers sleeping. I needed to talk to her here she was sleeping; I walked to the window and opened the curtains. Serena moaned and opened one eye.

"Whaaaaaaat?" She rolled over to her other side. I walked around the bed and sat down.

"I blacked out." There was no way to sugar coat this.

"Eh? Blacked out? We both don't do that." She paused and looked at the clock then back at me. "It's nine fifteen. What happened the no talking till double digits?"

The double digits rule was the rule that we didn’t call each other during the weekends until ten in the morning or later. It was a good rule because we both liked sleeping but now that something like a blackout had happened I had to know what was happening, double digits or not. 

"I'll buy us both an energy drink?" I said the magical phrase. Serena rolled out of bed then put on clothing. We left the house and walked to a corner store. I grabbed us some Amps and walked to the nearby park. I let this all happen in silence. She wasn't awake and it was only fair to let her get caffeine in her system before we talked. When we got to the park we sat down on a bench that looked over the mini playground. She took a sip of her drink then looked at me.

"Okay. What happened?" She asked still sleepy.

"I don't know. I blacked out. I don't remember anything after I sat down by the bon fire. I think I may have done something." Serena didn't speak, instead ushered me to continue. "Bramm told me we should hang out later. I had a big bottle of jack and coke and maybe I..." 

"You did what?" Serena seemed much more alert. More worried and interested by what I had just said. "You did text me about driving home with Bramm. You didn't hook up with him did you? I waited for you by the way! Thanks for leaving me out there! If I hadn't run into Danny I would have been stranded! I called the cops because I couldn't find you! Bramm? Eh. This is not good."  

"Yeah, not good. But I don't remember! Anything. I don't feel sore... so I'm thinking what ever happened that isn't it." I look away from Serena embarrassed. I never liked being out of control. Not knowing what I did or didn't do wasn't fun for me. "What do you think I should do?"

"Eh. I don't know." She drank the rest of her energy drink and thought for a moment. "You could ask him. He may know." 

He might know, she was right but that meant a drive to the country side. We both knew she was right and despite the rise in gas prices it was worth it to find out what had happened. I needed to go and find out what happened last night. I got up walks back to my house with Serena walking right beside me. We jumped into my car and drove. I liked my car except for the fact I wasn't allowed to use it after six pm. It took over half an hour to dive to Bramm's family's property. They had a million dollar home on a hundred Acers of land. We walked up the marble steps to the large oak door and rung the bell. Mrs. Collins answered the door, she looked worried.

"Serena? Eve? What are you doing here?" Mrs. Collins asked while holding a hanky she had a right to looked shocked. Serena and I both hadn't been to the house in over a year but I didn’t think that explained the hanky.  

"Is Bramm here?" Serena asked quickly.

"No, he hasn't been home all night. Have you girls seen him?" We both shook our heads. "Bramm isn't answering his cell and his friends aren't ether. Their families are worried. Are you sure you haven't seen them? We called the police and they are looking for them. They said there was a party? Did you two go?" 

"Yes but we left. We did see Bramm there though." I said. I wasn't sure about anything else other then the text massage I sent Serena and a scar on my wrist that I've never seen before. "What about low jack? On the SUV?" 

"The police are looking in to it." She looked more aged then I had ever seen her. She had a face lift and Botox so it was saying something. She was vain but she loved her family. "If you girls hear or think of anything."

"We'll tell you." Serena said gently. We got back into my beat up car and looked at each other. I started my car and drove away, not knowing where I was driving to. I ended up driving to the party site. We both got out of the car but didn't walk around. I couldn't think of anything new and she wasn't with me so couldn’t really help. 

"Maybe you killed Bramm?" Serena said as a joke and laughed. I looked at her with my mouth opened. "I was kidding Eve. You would kill anybody. Unless he tried to do something to you, did he? You could tell me, I wouldn't tell a soul." 

"I wish I knew. I mean I don't think I killed anybody but... I don't know." I sat on my car looking out on the mess in the field. Alcohol bottles littered a field around the fire pit, the after math of any real party. What was not a normal feature to the sight before us were tire tracks from Bramm's SUV lead on to the dirt road and then disappearing on to the paved road. I got back into my car and Serena followed. I drove slowly down the road; I was still looking for something.

"Eve can we speed this up?" Serena asked. That’s when I spotted it. There was a bunch of brush mashed down with mud kicked up. I nearly jumped out of the car and ran into the brush. Serena ran after me, she was really worried about me. I knew this but something told me to just keep going. 

There it was. The large shinny black SUV upside down in the middle of a clearing. I stopped and my breathing becoming more erratic. Serena jolted past me and to the SUV's driver side, she looked inside and started to cry and scream. I walked to the passenger’s side and looked on the ground. My cell phone was on the ground next to it. I picked it up and shoved it into my pocket. Serena was already calling the cops. I slid to the ground trying to think, something wasn't right. I was here, but how come I'm not dead?

"Please hurry!" Serena ran around the car to me. "Do you see Bramm? He's missing. No one was in the driver's seat or the passengers."

She wanted a reply from me. None came out of me, I couldn't talk. Call me selfish but I needed to focus on why my phone was here unless I was here. If I was here last night, why wasn't I dead or injured? Nothing was adding up in my head. Serena gave up on me and started franticly running around looking for Bramm's body. I was glad she left; it left me alone in quiet to think. Nothing made sense. 

Serena checked to see if the Bramm’s friends were still alive after not being able to find Bramm. I could tell by looking they had been gone a long time. I never liked them but I never wanted them dead and this looked like a painful way to go. I can’t imagine what their parents would go through. Serena was taking things pretty well, trying to help.

In the quiet I heard a moan, it was faint but closes. I got up and walked towards the moan. I found Bramm; he was bleeding and looked pale. I yelled for Serena, I saw her running for me and that when I heard the sirens. A shiver went up my spine. 

The next part happened so fast it felt like a giant blur. First Bramm was strapped to a gurney and I forced Serena to run back to the car with me and go to the ER. Watching Bramm get pushed into his operation and his parents arriving wanting answers, from Serena, me, and doctors. Serena and I have none, the doctors didn't have much more then that nothing. Bramm was hurt badly, how he’d managed to still alive was a "Miracle". Fractured ribs, torn spleen, concussion, and spinal cord injury were just a few of the problems. At noon he went into surgery and at nine thirty he was out. He was in the ICU. His mother wouldn't leave his side and his father sat in the hallway crying. Serena and I sat in the waiting room; it wasn't until ten that I stood up.

"We should go." I started to walk away, Serena didn't follow. "Serena? Come on, we need to get back. Schools tomorrow." 

"What really happened?" Serena was worried and upset. "You know something. I don't know if I believe that you don't remember anything. I think you need to let me know what’s up? Where you the driver? Did you crash the car and then think everyone was dead and make a run for it?"

"If I did remember, you don't think I would tell you? I always tell you everything!" I was hurt. "Serena. I. How could you think? I." 

I left. I couldn't believe that she could think that I would keep something from her. I jumped into my car and headed home. I knew she would call her mom or step dad and she would be fine. Would I? I wanted to go home and sleep, but I knew that no sleep would come to me tonight. I would be tossing and turning. Instead I flipped the lamp on and read until dawn. I could always read, at five am I ran on the treadmill my mother bought for herself and never used until I gave in to my stomach. I made myself eggs, bacon, home fries and cut up fruit. By the time I did all this it was time for me to get dressed for school. I put on the first thing I found and left. I got to school early and avoided people. I went to my first class and worked on my already finished homework. 

The bell finally rang for first period I could hear the gossip of Crater High’s leading man Bramm Collins. My first period was math class. I hated this class but it was better than thinking about me blacking out or Bramm. Second period was history, I like this class it was informational and interesting. Third was Spanish, I've taken it for four years and I've retained none of it and now I heard some of the girls gossiping about Bramm in español. Lunch, I spent it alone eating the school's awful food avoiding people. Fifth period was PE, it’s not my favorite but it felt good to be on a team playing soccer. Sixth period science, it use to be fun and now it’s boring as the teacher blathered on about mico cells girls texted and boys where nearly falling asleep. Seventh period was my theater class, it was my favorite class. It made me feel like I was alright like everything was perfect when I was on stage. When the bell rang dread spilled over me, I had to go home with nothing to distract me. Another thought hit me; Serena didn’t come to school today.  

I was half way home when I decided to go visit Bramm. I got to the hospital and went to his room. He was asleep, he was covered with bandages. The room was dark and quiet with the white sterile walls and cold tile floor. I sat in the chair near his bed. Bramm woke up suddenly.

“Eve?” His voice was harsh, it sounded painful. “You’re okay? How are the others? No one’s told me anything.”

“I, no, nobody made it.” I paused, Bramm nodded. He understood more about his life then I did. “I was in the car? I don’t remember anything about that night.” 

“You told me about cops coming I told you to get in. You blacked out? Well you did drink a lot that night.” He was taking deep breaths but he wasn’t finished talking. “You told me to pull over. I was driving drunk. I didn’t listen.” 

“You never do.” He laughed and then the laugh turned into coughing. I grabbed his water and he drank some. I waited for him to calm down before asking him anything. I knew he was in pain and I hated seeing him like this. He was a jerk but he hadn’t deserved this. “Do you remember after the crash?” 

“I was tossed out of the car. Things got blurry; I thought I saw something running through the trees. It was so fast. I thought you got taken away by it.  Crazy right?” 

“I woke up in my own bed this morning, no injuries. So maybe it’s not so crazy.” I told him.

“Lucky, you. Things could have been worse. I mean look at me.” He held back another laugh. He was trying to hide most of his pain, he failed but it made me like him more. “My mom is gonna be back any minute. I want to be asleep when that happens; she too worried all the time. Hey you missed Serena though. She hung out all day. Think I have a shot with her?”

I had an urge to punch him in the arm but instead I walked out of the room without answering him. I had nothing to say that would help him. Serena would never admit it but she hated him so much that she really liked him. I got back into my car and drove home. I had even more to think about. I was in the SUV when it crashed. What did that say about me? How did I get home?

On the drive home I thought about stopping by and talking to Serena but decided against it. She was too mad at me right now and I hadn’t a clue what had really happened. I wasn’t driving the SUV when it had crashed which made me feel better. I kept looking at my wrist with the new old looking crescent moon scar and wonder what could have been from. I pushed it out of my mind and tugged on my jacket until it covered it. Out of sight out of mind seemed like a good way to go.

Thankfully when I got home I wasn’t bothered by my mom or father. My room was blissfully messy I thought as I collapsed onto my bed. I didn’t bother changing, working on only five something hours for over forty eight hours but I did manage to kick off my shoes before closing my eyes. I went to sleep, blank, black, dreamless sleep.