13.

13.

 

  “She’s a f*****g douchebag.” Ruby declared. “I knew it was a bad idea that you went there! I shouldn’t have let you go. I knew it!”

     Ruby and Parrish sat in Ruby’s apartment watching South of Nowhere reruns.

     “It’s not like it’s your fault. I’m the stupid one.” Parrish confessed, passing Ruby the large bag of Cheetos. “I knew better. I really did. And I still went anyway.”

     “It’s okay. You’re back now. That’s what matters. And now you know how much she really cares about your feelings.”

     “Word.” Parrish agreed. “Five hours, Ruby. That’s how long picking up a ‘friend’ took. Five hours.”

     “I thought you said you left right after you two argued?”

     “I went back... waited in the apartment until she got back.”

     “Oh, Pear…” Ruby said sympathetically, rubbing her shoulder. “I’m so glad that nothing else happened, though. Can you imagine how you would have felt if she’d brought Dana home with her?”

     “Well, my thoughts hadn’t gotten that far, but thanks for the visuals, Ruby.”

     “Sorry…”

     Parrish exhaled. “It’s okay. It’s not you that I’m mad at. I’m just so irritated with her.”

     “Well, you’re home now. Stop worrying about it.” Ruby said. “Has she called?”

     “Of course she’s called. It’s been at least twenty times since I’ve been home.”

     “And you haven’t picked up?”

     “I didn’t really have anything to say.” Parrish admitted. “I’ve only been home for a few days. I guess… I still need time to myself to get my mind around the whole thing.”

     “Good idea.”

     “But… enough about me and my s****y love life. I feel like I’ve been so consumed by my relationship with Levi that I haven’t even asked how you’re doing.” Parrish told her. “…How are you doing?”

     Ruby let out a sigh and allowed her eyes to fill with tears. “Not good.” She revealed, putting down the bag of cheese puffs.

     “What’s going on?” Parrish asked her, pausing the DVD.

     Ruby put her hands over her eyes and began to sob. Tears ran down her cheeks as she slightly hunched over. Parrish put her arm around her and let Ruby put her head on her shoulder.

     “I have no idea what I’m doing!” Ruby cried. “I fucked everything up!”

     “No, you didn’t.” Parrish assured her. “You made decisions and they had consequences. But that does not mean you fucked anything up.”

     “How I let this happen to me?” Ruby asked. “Caspian and I were so happy before all of this happened. I thought he loved me, you know?”

     “He does… he’s just scared”

     “How do you say… that you love someone, and then as soon as one thing changes, everything changes?”

     “Ruby…”

     “No! Don’t do that!” Ruby yelled, getting up from the couch. “I shared a year and a half with him! And then he backs out as soon as I tell him…” Ruby put her hands over her swollen stomach. “How could he just leave like that?”

     “I know you’re scared, too. You’re just as scared as he is.”

     “Scared isn’t the word.” Ruby continued. “I’m not like you. I don’t have a mother and a sister around for help or a father who calls every week and sends little cards with money inside.”

     “I don’t want you to get too worked up.”

     “My mom is in a halfway house, my dad is remarried to a woman who hates me and my sister has too many kids of her own to even think about me and mine.” She cried. “And Caspian… I’ve barely heard from him since I told him I was pregnant. And that was almost six months ago.”

     “I know.”

     “I just… I can’t catch a break.”

     Ruby sat back down next to Parrish. “At least… at least Levi wants to be with you.” she said. “She treats you like s**t sometimes… but at least she picks up when you call.”

     Parrish ignored the comments about Levi and asked Ruby, “Have you… thought any more about what you may wanna do?”

     “I know what the options are, Pear. Either I keep the baby or I give her to someone else.”

     “Yeah… and?” Parrish asked, waiting for an answer.

     “I don’t want to give her away. I want her. I just don’t know how to do this alone.” Ruby said, softly. “I never thought I’d have to go through something like this alone.”

     “You’re not alone. I’ll always be here.” Parrish told Ruby. “I’ll be her father if you need me to! You know I’m way better than Caspian’s a*s anyway.”

     Ruby and Parrish laughed. Ruby rubbed the top of her stomach, with a pained look on her face.

     “Ooh, she’s been kicking me all damn day. I think she’s playing soccer in there.” Ruby complained. Her facial expression softened as she asked Parrish, “You wanna feel?”

     Parrish laughed a little and hesitantly put her hands on Ruby’s stomach.

     “There’s a life in there, Parrish.” Ruby said, smiling. “My life.”