SHORE BIRDS

Friends are clustered on the shore

SHORE BIRDS

 

Storm approaches

Roller reef set

Hurricane mast loosened

Ditty stored

 

Swells increase

The smell of death in the wind

Kill engines

Shut down head

 

All hatches secure now

Just sit back you are alone

Better here

Only your sins will you atone

 

First giant wave

She rides easily up, up , up

Crashing down the other side

Unlike the city where friends lied

 

Wind screaming crescendo in D

Black sky hit by streaming fire

Now you are home dumb man

Nothing here to aspire

 

Just survival as was your life

Death will be fast

Cutting like the surgeon`s knife

Loose the main`sl let her run

 

Winch down the fore jib hard

Only a tiny piece of canvas

Not like the human herd

That little piece of canvas life or death

 

They did`nt care back there

Who cares now

The old Catalina just cement and cloth

Will either kill or save you both

 

Screaming in the halyards

Light streaks across black sky

Thunder crashes with bursts of sound

We`ll ride her down

 

Soaked, stunned,  but saved by self

Not like the city life

Where friends are nowhere to be found

Only the sickness they call a life

 

----- Eagle Cruagh

Reviews

[Norma M Sutton]

I like the feel of this one. Much as I love the water and the ocean I have no desire to be out on it during a storm. Guess I remember too well dad telling us about those waves standing the aircraft carrier on end and then touring the Yorktown and seeing with my own eyes just how BIG that thing is.

[emmajoy]

Such a powerful, graphic poem. You're a man of the sea, you know its calm and its storms only too well. However, here you've made the analogy between storm at sea and life and all it throws up. Then you move into the truth, we have to be self-reliant, fight our own battles, face the storm because, at the end of the day, we can't always rely on others, there's only self.

There are some great phrases in this, ' ..Crashing down the other side ~ Unlike the city where friends lied'

[x]

In a word...sumptuous!!
Love all the wonderful drama of the scene...the picture painted causes the breath to catch in the throat as man faces down nature in its mad, turbulent wrath. Especially enjoyed was the comparison of the battle with nature with the battles of city life. Both are rugged and brutal but one is honest and clean while the other is just plain cruel. A well layered write and extremely enjoyed.

[Phibby Venable]

this is a great piece of writing. excellent images and very
thought provoking and well said.
Wind screaming crescendo in D
Black sky hit by streaming fire
Now you are home dumb man
Nothing here to aspire ______________and yet, someone that can write this strongly, should be able to aspire to anything!!

[Joanna Maharis]

A beautiful piece of writing filled with thought provoking, captivating, imagery. I like the way in which all of the details are so intricately woven together.

[Eagle Cruagh]

Nope, not self pity.
Withdrawal perhaps.
From time to time we have to man the
ship without a crew. In the long run we
have no one to answer to but ourselves.
We will either sink or swim. That`s life.

----- Eagle Cruagh

[Simone]

""Looking back--I should have titled this
"Self Pity" Sorry ! "" - Hey- this is good ^_^ I really really like it- correction- Love it! It's wonderfully written

[Stephie204]

cool :]