Searching on the ceiling

Laying in bed, I just stare at my ceiling looking for some sort of writing that I know I'll never be able to see

As if right in front of me sprawled across my ceiling is some invisible scripture that would solve all of life's mysteries

I can't believe the things you've done and said to me

I can't believe the things i've done and said to you

But yet, after all the things I've been told you did and all the things I saw with my own eye

Something inside of me is still not willing to let this love die

You see, two years may have flown by

But those two years, even towards the end as we slid hopelessly downhill, were still the best two years of my life

We laughed

We cried

We made it to the point where I could tell what you wanted just by the look in your eye

I know I shouldn't be hanging on

I know i should give up

But I've just never been that kind of guy

Maybe I am too sensitive and maybe I do forgive and apologize when I really shouldn't but the thing is we all have to die

So why die with a hatred for someone

Someone who you shared everything with and held near and dear

Someone who when you held them and they held you made it so that you couldn't even remember the word fear

Maybe I am crazy, maybe everyone is right

But I dont care what they say because no matter how painful it is on the inside

The next day I'm still going to get up

I'm still going to pretend everything is alright

But it will still never be as great as it was when I had you right by my side...