Day in the Hospital- Chapter 26- February 11th, 6:20 AM

After their meeting with Dr. Kanes, Kyle wants to get better, but he is still skeptical about it. Will he make a step forward?

            I hear my door shut quietly as I’m coming out my slumber, a nurse must’ve just checked on me. If I could control my stupid impulses I wouldn’t be going to this mental hospital but I guess it is for the best especially when I can’t control myself when I’m depressed. At the moment I don’t feel like a prisoner because I have TV, a bed, and I’m not hooked up to any machinery, but my left hand is handcuffed to the bed. I press the red button next to me to get a nurse to unlock me so I can use the bathroom. I wait about two minutes still no one comes. I lie my head back on my pillow. Come on b***h, I gotta pee! I hear a knock on the door and it slowly opens. It is a nurse. Finally!

            “Did you need something, Kyle?” Oh my god, not this b***h again. It’s the woman I yelled at because I couldn’t see Brad before he died. Great, just great.

            “Can you unlock me so I use the bathroom?”

            Of course,” she smiled, I could totally tell that’s a fake smile. Don’t try and impress me because I’m one your mental patients now.

            “Thanks,” I mumble. I stand and turn on the bright bathroom light and shut the door behind me. I use the facility and wash my hands. I look down usually as I’m washing my hands, but this I look up�"at myself. My normally dark brown are even darker now for some reason and my pale skin is making me look like I’m glowing. Am I alive? Am I a ghost? What’s happening to me? Am I the real problem? Of course you’re Kyle, you’re the monster. No! I turn around immediately and look at the blank white wall. Breathe�"remember what the doctors keep telling you, stay calm. I breathe, I know I need help, and I know I’m unstable, blah, blah, and blah. I don’t care nor don’t care until I am not feeling constantly suicidal. I finish washing my hands and dry my hands with the paper towels. I open the door slowly.

            “Oh god!”

            “Are you all set?” The nurse asks me. You’re still standing there waiting right there for me to get out. You look like a fricken robot with that fake smile and standing up so straight that a pencil would be more curved than you. Please be human should be plastered all over my face so you can be less annoying and robotic-like.

            “Yeah, I’m set.” I open door all the way and proceed back to my bed. I sit and lie on head back down on my pillow.

            “Comfortable?” She asks me in a very snooty tone.

            “Yup, you bet,” I reply. She take the handcuff and clips in my left hand once again.

            “There all set,” she tells me. “Is there anything else I can do for you?” When can you leave? Can Dr. Kanes please come and do the psychological exam so I can get the f**k out of here!

            “Is there any estimated time when Dr. Kanes will be taking me to do my exam?”

            “I can check on that and let you know in a few minutes.”

            “Okay.” She mouths the word “ok” clearly enough for me to see. Hey, b***h, the idea of mouthing is to do it to yourself, not so others can see you, especially towards the person are mouthing it to. I feel like this hellhole is going to be more of a prison than the mental hospital! The only reason I’m so irritable is because I’m stuck in the same wing that I was in when I attempted suicide and I never got to say goodbye to Brad. I’m still grieving about my dead brother because it has been less than twelve hours since he has died, and now they are making do an examination to test my mental state, then go to a stupid mental hospital. I am overall not impressed.  Once again I hear a light knock on my door, she must be coming back to tell me when Dr. Kanes is getting me. A different nurse comes in this time, it’s a male.

            “Hi, Kyle?” 

            “Yes, that’s me.” Mmm, he’s cute�"I could get use to him being my nurse.

            “Hi, I’m Nurse Bradley Hunter, I work the morning shifts,” he tells me as I shake his muscular hand. “You wanted an update when Dr. Kanes is going to see you today?”

            “Yes please.”

            “Alright, from what I got from your chart out there was that Dr. Kanes is going to perform a mental psychological  examination on you at 9:30 so, just a couple of hours from now.”

            “Okay. Thank you for the update.”

            “You’re welcome,” he tells me as he quietly shuts my door. I’m glad it was him and not that b***h-of-a-nurse, Samantha.

 

 

            Two hours pass by, and I’m getting extremely anxious and hungry. I’m tired of being chained up like a f*****g dog and fed processed granny food. I’m just ready for Dr. Kanes to come in and to do exam so I can stop worrying about how the future is going to treat me. I try to doze off for a few minutes just to kill time because there is nothing else to do, but then I realized I totally forgot that I had a TV in my room that I can watch. The red button got pushed off the bed and I can’t reach it because I’m chained up! F**k my life always! I wait a couple of minutes and I hear my door slowly open again. Is it Dr. Kanes? I get extremely excited just to get over this part of the ordeal so I can start healing, but at hey, at least I’m willing to get better. It opens all the way and I see Nurse Samantha come in. F**k! Why must you come in and bother me again, I mean come on!

            “Hi, Kyle, how are you doing?” Very f*****g irritable because you keep coming in here.

            “I’m fine.”

            “That’s good. I came in to check on you and to let you know that Dr. Kanes will be coming in a few minutes and grabbing you for your exam,” she smiles. Hallelujah! It is about time.

            “Okay, thank you,” I say. My face is starting to glow again with hope. After she shuts the door I watch the clock aimlessly�"waiting every little second for Dr. Kanes to pop back in. Tick tock, tick tock.  Come on, come on, come on. I never realized that noise of the clock was so peaceful and calming in a strange way.

            “Kyle?”

            “Oh god!” I jump ten feet in the air.

            “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Dr. Kanes tells chuckling.

            “It’s alright�"I was just waiting for you and I didn’t notice you already came in,” I explain to me.

            “Oh okay. So, I know it is a little before 9, but I thought we could start the exam a little early if that is okay with you.”

            “Now is perfect�"the sooner the better.

            “Alright, it sounds like a plan. Do you prefer to do it here or more in a secluded room?”

            “I’m okay in here if you’re not, but if we stay in here can the door be shut and may I please be no longer handcuffed?”

            “Yes, I can shut the door and let me go grab the key so I can unlock you,” he smiled. He leaves the room and I’m just sitting there�"my body is so pumped to get this going! He returns with the key and unlocks me. The sound of the handcuff breaks free from my left hand.

            “Freedom,” I sigh in relief. Dr. Kanes chuckles because of my comment.

            “Okay, Kyle. Let’s start.” He grabs a chair from the side and folds a paper back. “We are going to start with general information.”

            “Okay,” I tell him.

            “Full name?” He asks.

            “Kyle Aaron Jenson.”

            “Day of birth?”

            “November 20^th, 1997”

            “Home address?”

            “331 Main St. Hill City.”

            “Social security?”

            “006-63-3439”

            “Parents names?”

            “Heather and Tim Jenson,”

            “And you’re here for a psychological exam and permanent stay at the Hill City Regional Mental Hospital.”

            “Alright, Kyle, are you ready to start the exam? Any questions?”

            “Nope, I’m ready.”

            “Alright, take a deep breather.” I breathe in deeply and out slowly. “I’m going to give you a form of sixteen questions to get a better and deeper understanding of your mental state so I can conclude if you have any life altering diseases and I’ll be right here if you any assistance on a question or a word.”

            “Okay.”

 

 

Check. Check. Check.  I’m marking all these questions, I know there is more of a chance of something wrong with me. I am curious what is wrong with me. I have a hunch that they can find out what is wrong with me because I can relate to a lot of these questions. ‘Have you ever had a period of constant sadness?’ Check. ‘Have you ever self-harmed, considered suicide, thought about death, or attempted suicide?’ Check, all of them. This exam is making feel more and more depressed by the minute�"I hope it really helps.

The exam took me about 35 minutes to complete and I understood every question and about 75% of the possible answers�"I checked, I’m feeling very worried.
            “Excellent Kyle, I’ll run your results down to the lab and it should take a couple of hours for them to process all of the information and then we will go from there,” Dr. Kanes explains to me.

“Should I just sit tight here?”

“Yeah, I’ll have a nurse come in and get you situated again.”

“Okay.” Dr. Kanes smiles and then leaves. Great, the b***h is going to come in again and handcuff me again to this stupid bed.            I hear my door shut quietly as I’m coming out my slumber, a nurse must’ve just checked on me. If I could control my stupid impulses I wouldn’t be going to this mental hospital but I guess it is for the best especially when I can’t control myself when I’m depressed. At the moment I don’t feel like a prisoner because I have TV, a bed, and I’m not hooked up to any machinery, but my left hand is handcuffed to the bed. I press the red button next to me to get a nurse to unlock me so I can use the bathroom. I wait about two minutes still no one comes. I lie my head back on my pillow. Come on b***h, I gotta pee! I hear a knock on the door and it slowly opens. It is a nurse. Finally!

            “Did you need something, Kyle?” Oh my god, not this b***h again. It’s the woman I yelled at because I couldn’t see Brad before he died. Great, just great.

            “Can you unlock me so I use the bathroom?”

            Of course,” she smiled, I could totally tell that’s a fake smile. Don’t try and impress me because I’m one your mental patients now.

            “Thanks,” I mumble. I stand and turn on the bright bathroom light and shut the door behind me. I use the facility and wash my hands. I look down usually as I’m washing my hands, but this I look up�"at myself. My normally dark brown are even darker now for some reason and my pale skin is making me look like I’m glowing. Am I alive? Am I a ghost? What’s happening to me? Am I the real problem? Of course you’re Kyle, you’re the monster. No! I turn around immediately and look at the blank white wall. Breathe�"remember what the doctors keep telling you, stay calm. I breathe, I know I need help, and I know I’m unstable, blah, blah, and blah. I don’t care nor don’t care until I am not feeling constantly suicidal. I finish washing my hands and dry my hands with the paper towels. I open the door slowly.

            “Oh god!”

            “Are you all set?” The nurse asks me. You’re still standing there waiting right there for me to get out. You look like a fricken robot with that fake smile and standing up so straight that a pencil would be more curved than you. Please be human should be plastered all over my face so you can be less annoying and robotic-like.

            “Yeah, I’m set.” I open door all the way and proceed back to my bed. I sit and lie on head back down on my pillow.

            “Comfortable?” She asks me in a very snooty tone.

            “Yup, you bet,” I reply. She take the handcuff and clips in my left hand once again.

            “There all set,” she tells me. “Is there anything else I can do for you?” When can you leave? Can Dr. Kanes please come and do the psychological exam so I can get the f**k out of here!

            “Is there any estimated time when Dr. Kanes will be taking me to do my exam?”

            “I can check on that and let you know in a few minutes.”

            “Okay.” She mouths the word “ok” clearly enough for me to see. Hey, b***h, the idea of mouthing is to do it to yourself, not so others can see you, especially towards the person are mouthing it to. I feel like this hellhole is going to be more of a prison than the mental hospital! The only reason I’m so irritable is because I’m stuck in the same wing that I was in when I attempted suicide and I never got to say goodbye to Brad. I’m still grieving about my dead brother because it has been less than twelve hours since he has died, and now they are making do an examination to test my mental state, then go to a stupid mental hospital. I am overall not impressed.  Once again I hear a light knock on my door, she must be coming back to tell me when Dr. Kanes is getting me. A different nurse comes in this time, it’s a male.

            “Hi, Kyle?” 

            “Yes, that’s me.” Mmm, he’s cute�"I could get use to him being my nurse.

            “Hi, I’m Nurse Bradley Hunter, I work the morning shifts,” he tells me as I shake his muscular hand. “You wanted an update when Dr. Kanes is going to see you today?”

            “Yes please.”

            “Alright, from what I got from your chart out there was that Dr. Kanes is going to perform a mental psychological  examination on you at 9:30 so, just a couple of hours from now.”

            “Okay. Thank you for the update.”

            “You’re welcome,” he tells me as he quietly shuts my door. I’m glad it was him and not that b***h-of-a-nurse, Samantha.

 

 

            Two hours pass by, and I’m getting extremely anxious and hungry. I’m tired of being chained up like a f*****g dog and fed processed granny food. I’m just ready for Dr. Kanes to come in and to do exam so I can stop worrying about how the future is going to treat me. I try to doze off for a few minutes just to kill time because there is nothing else to do, but then I realized I totally forgot that I had a TV in my room that I can watch. The red button got pushed off the bed and I can’t reach it because I’m chained up! F**k my life always! I wait a couple of minutes and I hear my door slowly open again. Is it Dr. Kanes? I get extremely excited just to get over this part of the ordeal so I can start healing, but at hey, at least I’m willing to get better. It opens all the way and I see Nurse Samantha come in. F**k! Why must you come in and bother me again, I mean come on!

            “Hi, Kyle, how are you doing?” Very f*****g irritable because you keep coming in here.

            “I’m fine.”

            “That’s good. I came in to check on you and to let you know that Dr. Kanes will be coming in a few minutes and grabbing you for your exam,” she smiles. Hallelujah! It is about time.

            “Okay, thank you,” I say. My face is starting to glow again with hope. After she shuts the door I watch the clock aimlessly�"waiting every little second for Dr. Kanes to pop back in. Tick tock, tick tock.  Come on, come on, come on. I never realized that noise of the clock was so peaceful and calming in a strange way.

            “Kyle?”

            “Oh god!” I jump ten feet in the air.

            “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Dr. Kanes tells chuckling.

            “It’s alright�"I was just waiting for you and I didn’t notice you already came in,” I explain to me.

            “Oh okay. So, I know it is a little before 9, but I thought we could start the exam a little early if that is okay with you.”

            “Now is perfect�"the sooner the better.

            “Alright, it sounds like a plan. Do you prefer to do it here or more in a secluded room?”

            “I’m okay in here if you’re not, but if we stay in here can the door be shut and may I please be no longer handcuffed?”

            “Yes, I can shut the door and let me go grab the key so I can unlock you,” he smiled. He leaves the room and I’m just sitting there�"my body is so pumped to get this going! He returns with the key and unlocks me. The sound of the handcuff breaks free from my left hand.

            “Freedom,” I sigh in relief. Dr. Kanes chuckles because of my comment.

            “Okay, Kyle. Let’s start.” He grabs a chair from the side and folds a paper back. “We are going to start with general information.”

            “Okay,” I tell him.

            “Full name?” He asks.

            “Kyle Aaron Jenson.”

            “Day of birth?”

            “November 20^th, 1997”

            “Home address?”

            “331 Main St. Hill City.”

            “Social security?”

            “006-63-3439”

            “Parents names?”

            “Heather and Tim Jenson,”

            “And you’re here for a psychological exam and permanent stay at the Hill City Regional Mental Hospital.”

            “Alright, Kyle, are you ready to start the exam? Any questions?”

            “Nope, I’m ready.”

            “Alright, take a deep breather.” I breathe in deeply and out slowly. “I’m going to give you a form of sixteen questions to get a better and deeper understanding of your mental state so I can conclude if you have any life altering diseases and I’ll be right here if you any assistance on a question or a word.”

            “Okay.”

 

 

Check. Check. Check.  I’m marking all these questions, I know there is more of a chance of something wrong with me. I am curious what is wrong with me. I have a hunch that they can find out what is wrong with me because I can relate to a lot of these questions. ‘Have you ever had a period of constant sadness?’ Check. ‘Have you ever self-harmed, considered suicide, thought about death, or attempted suicide?’ Check, all of them. This exam is making feel more and more depressed by the minute�"I hope it really helps.

The exam took me about 35 minutes to complete and I understood every question and about 75% of the possible answers�"I checked, I’m feeling very worried.
            “Excellent Kyle, I’ll run your results down to the lab and it should take a couple of hours for them to process all of the information and then we will go from there,” Dr. Kanes explains to me.

“Should I just sit tight here?”

“Yeah, I’ll have a nurse come in and get you situated again.”

“Okay.” Dr. Kanes smiles and then leaves. Great, the b***h is going to come in again and handcuff me again to this stupid bed.