To Make Things Worse- Chapter 18- February 10th, 11 AM

Kyle's first trip back to the hospital goes well until his mother is missing? Where is she? Find out where the nurse takes Kyle.

            My Mom looks at me, she is shocked as am I. She runs up to me, and hugs me tightly. I can’t open my eyes anymore, I don’t want to see this anymore. She’s crying, she’s telling me it’s going to be okay, but it’s not, again. What I see, laying there, just about lifeless is my brother, Brad.

            I stand there, silent. I don’t move, but my Mom keeps on hugging me, but all I do is cry. I can’t control myself.

            I understand everything now. Everything makes sense. Why did I have that sudden interest at the crash scene and looking at the ambulance? Because it was someone I truly love and care about. It was the reason why I felt so worried the whole time I was here, I subconsciously knew that something bad happened, but I didn’t realize it until it happened.

            “How long have you been with him,” I ask my Mom, as I’m still buried in her shoulder, hugging her.

            “About ten minutes,” she tells me. “Shortly after you went in with the nurse, a receptionist recognized me, and she told me that she tried to call the house because an emergency occurred.” She started sniffling.

            “So what happened?”

            “She told me that there was an accident involving Brad, and it was serious. So I immediately panicked, and I thought the worst. I followed her to the ICU where they were just stabilizing him. I was in total shock. I can’t believe this has happened, I don’t be in this situation again!” She wails. I feel so helpless because I’m in the same situation. She sounds like I do when I’m stressed and have nowhere else to turn. It almost feels like I’m the parent comforting the child. I glance up at my brother. He literally looks lifeless. All these machines and tubes hooked up to him. I could imagine what I looked like when I was in the ICU, I probably looked a lot like this. Now, I know how it feels to be on the other end of the stick.

            She lets go of me, and looks at me in the eyes, we both have tears in our eyes. “I have to go call your father, you stay here with Brad,” she tells me as she pulls out her phone. I nod my head. She opens the curtains and closes it slowly behind her. I do nothing. I stare and stare, and for some reason, I just see myself in the bed where Brad is laying. This is just making me cry harder and realize what I put my family through. I guess this is my payback for what I did to them. I hope Brad and I can pull through everything.

            After my weary breakdown is over, I finally calm down a little. I pull up a chair next to Brad’s bedside. My Moms still out of the room talking to my Dad. I have my legs pulled up to my face and my chin is resting softly on my kneecaps. I still can’t believe this has happen, I mean I never thought my situation could get any worse. Oh my god, why am I always self-centered!  I sit there in silence hoping everything will be okay, but in the pit of my stomach I know this isn’t going to turn out well. Everything on Brad is monitored: his heart rate, oxygen levels, and breathing. It’s scary to see my only brother on a ventilator and a tube down his throat. His injuries are pretty substantial. Beep, beep, beep… That’s all I hear, it’s frightening.

            My Mom comes back in, and tells me that my father is leaving work right now to head here. She plops in a chair next to me, still sniffling.

            “I’ve had nothing, but bad luck in the last couple of years.” She tells me. I sit there silent, absorbing what she just said. I want her to realize that these freak accidents happen, and sometimes life sucks. I also want to say that in my situation, I had very acceptable reasons to do what I did. Looking back at it, it probably wasn’t the smartest idea to do, but I couldn’t help that I was severely depressed, bullied, harassed every day, and I had no one to talk to, so I resorted to cutting, which ultimately led to my attempted suicide. If Brad dies, I’m going to be a total wreck. Not only do I have to go back into the world of depression, but I have to face every day tactics all over again. I don’t think that my Mom knows that my depression is still with me, and even with the meds, I could relapse. It gets me worried to think about that, but if I go back into a state of my severe depression, I’m not going to have any control again. I’ll be a loose cannon all over again.

            “I’m sorry, Mom. I don’t know how to make this any better, but I’m hoping everything works out. I know it seem pretty skeptical from your son who just tried to end his own life, but I don’t want to lose him either, we are all in this together,” I never looked at her at all when I just said that.

            “I know. I know honey,” that’s is all she repeats. “I’m just worried that our situation is going to get worse. I’m scared as well that we are going to lose him, but we can’t lose hope.” She touches my shoulder. I look up at her. “We all need to be strong. I need to come to terms with the facts that you’ll never be the same again, my marriage with your father is gone forever, and Brad might not come out of this, but if he does, I would have to be dependent for both my sons for a while.

            “I’ll get better soon enough,” I reassure her.

            “I know, but it isn’t going to help if Brad can’t pull out of this,” she tells. I see a tear starting to form, and slowly fall down her cheek and then fall off her gentle face.

            Another couple of minutes, and my mom I are just sitting in the chairs that are next to Brad’s bedside. We haven’t met the nurse or his doctors, and no one has checked up on him, maybe they are just waiting for all of us to arrive. We hear rapid footsteps approach Brad’s room; the curtain swings open swiftly. It is my dad. He stops in his tracks.

            “Oh, gosh,” his voice trails off as he sighs.

            “He’s in pretty bad shape,” my mom tells him. I hug him.

            “I didn’t realize it was this bad.” I see my Dad staring aimlessly at Brad and all the machines that have him barely alive. The ventilator going up and down, hissing to the sound of his heartbeat. My Dad is slowly breaking down in tears next to Brad, I can do nothing but stare at him and cry. I don’t want to lose a brother, let alone let my depression succumb over me again. My Dad is on his knees laying his head down on Brad’s bed, sobbing softly to himself. Unexpectedly the curtain to Brad’s room opened.

            “Hello everybody,” a man says.

            “Hello Doctor Kanes,” I said. Dr. Kanes was one of my doctors who took care of me while I was in the hospital, ironically, we meet again.

            “I imagine you guys weren’t expected to be back at the hospital this soon,” he told us softly.

            “No, we were not,” my Mom said, looking away from him, but after a short pause for a few seconds, she returned her gaze towards.

            “What even happened to him?” My dad asked loudly towards Dr. Kanes, while still sobbing.

            “From what we know, Mr. Jenson, is that Brad was traveling on Route 122 when another car in the other lane veered into Brad’s lane and hit him head-on,” he said almost unemotional. “I’m sorry that tragic accident happened.” My dad stood up walking right towards Dr. Kanes, and stopped when he was about six inches from his face.

            “You tell me right now who hit him!” He yelled at Dr. Kanes while pointing his finger directly right in his face.

            “Calm down, Mr. Jenson, I’m not legally-” my dad cuts him off. He grabs him by the coat.

            “Honey, calm down!” My mom shouts at my dad.

            “Don’t ever tell me to calm down!” He sternly tells him.

            “I need security now!” Yells Dr. Kanes. I’m freaking out as it is, and now my dad is totally making a scene, which is embarrassing all of us. Two nurses and a security guards come, and pull my dad off of Dr. Kanes.

            “I need all of you out of this room!” Said one of the nurses who just came in.

            “But we are not causing the disturbance here, we need to be with him!” My mom screamed at the nurse.

            “I don’t care, we need to get control of the situation. I understand this is a hard time for you and your family, but we don’t need this kind of hostile environment for the patient, and we can’t tolerate this kind of behavior in our rooms.” My mom and I quietly left the room and abided what the nurse had told us. I could tell that my mom was furious at the nurse. It left me shocked and horrified that my parents would scream at the people who trying to save my brother’s life. I was silent as a mouse, I haven’t said anything since I talked to my mom almost thirty minutes ago.  The nurse kindly escorted us to the waiting room for the ICU. She could’ve just ditched us and left us to figure out where everything was in this hospital. I imagine my mom knew every square inch of this hospital because I was in here for so long.

Reviews

[Maya Jane]

The nurse sounds like a very mean person. I'm trying to refrain from swearing because it don't like doing it on the computer. But the nurse overreacted. I can't believe it's Brad in the hospital! I bet his mom is going to regret kicking him out now.