Just a heart or a black hole

Just some thoughts

Seeing me now I realize that I have let this destroy me

I no longer see much of the good, if any at all

This was something I was born with

So how can knowing about it change me so?

It’s not like I’m truly a different person, or am I

Does knowing really make life oh so different

Things have changed but then again they always do

So am I truly incapable of being that person again

Can I go back to the point where hope came so easily

Will I ever let go of this anger, or will it always burden me

I know it doesn’t make me who I am, but does it change me

Has it made me this aggravated pathetic person

Parts of my personality hold true still to this day

I still care too much and try to help as much as I can

Only now those are not good things, they make you a pushover

This in turn leaves you to look like the weak one,

And everyone knows that the hunters go after the weak

So you either become a hunter or become cold

You get changed no matter how you were

So maybe it’s not this that changed me, not entirely

Maybe it’s a mix of everything, maybe my heart isn’t it

Perhaps I just haven’t tried to figure this all out

Have I been hiding behind my anger and rage

Have the years of hatred at my heart warped me

Am I the one with the black hole in my chest

I care though, about them even when I don’t want to

So am I the caring beauty or the destructive beast