10 Things That May Happen If You Befriend A Dwarf

• You know the exact location of all taverns within two - days travel.

How is this a problem?

• You wake up in the morning wondering what day it is and where all your gold went?

Well you were going to spend it anyway so why not at the tavern? It's Sunday, don't feel bad Barb didn't know what day it was either.

• You notice after a few weeks that your belly now hangs over your pants.

How is it the dwarves fault that you stole their look?

• When asked what you will be having for dinner you quickly reply with your three favorite ales.

So you picked up on their eating habbits? What's so wrong with that?

• You use your Tome Of Knowledge to balance your bar stool.

Well it was wobbly, just because weebles can wobble and not fall down doesn't mean you can. The bar stool needed to be fixed it's not your fault that was the only book that works.

• You realize that dwarves do not shave because they do not have a steady hand after a full night of drinking.

This may be true but more importantly it's because they know their beards kick a*s and there's no point in shaving.

• Shiny metal objects become a huge distraction.

Again you had this issue before you befriended the dwarves, their axes are just too big of a distraction for you.

• You notice that most things are not made for the virtically challenged?

NO f*****g Duh. How long have us short people been bitching about it. Your just realizing this NOW!

• When questioned about the accuracy of your information, you proceed to rant for the next 20 minutes about youf lineage and the person's audacity in questioning your knowledge.

Well this is reasonable. They were wrong and you were right. They had no reason to question you so ranting about their audacity is perfectly fine.

• Waking up sober becomes a caues for celebration...or morning.

Isn't taht how it is everyday. Don't blame the dwaves for your issues with liquor.

 

 

So, this probably seems random as hell but for those of you who play warhammer there is a list of these ten things. My responses to these are under them. So yeah

Reviews

[Gomer LePoet]

This is whacked out! Your SOH is outa state and outa site. Don't really understand this completly, but I still like it. signed Dopey

[GTVile]

Hahaha, I like how it goes full circle. That's awesome.

[Michael X]

wow, funny, unique, entertaining! "warhammer" that's perfect, awsome job :)

[J.M]

Never played warhammer, but i thought the poem was great - very original and quite amusing.

[Nobody.]

LOL! Good stuff. I like Dwarves. I wish I were a Battle Rager!
cheers!