Always, Never, Maybe

Written during freshman year.

Time is ecstasy,
breathe it in.

Breathe in the moments when
it’s not about the nevers
but the nows.

Maybe this time it can change,
I don’t know why but I feel it.
Could you ever feel it,
or just push me away
again?

I need to know.
I need to know if it’s worth it.
I need to know how long to wait
just to see a pleasant face,
or maybe just a trace
of love,
or life,
or hate or death,
or anything.

But can’t you take away the doubt,
can’t you answer my dreams?
Could you break this silence
slowly killing me?