Fiona Apple

Her seductive voice,

belts out half notes, quarter notes, sharps, and flats,
that surround her
and bound her body
in a hemp rope

Her hair
dances like a flame
and sets the hemp ablaze.
It consumes her.

She purses her dull bitten lips
and releases the smoke
that coils around her limbs
and disappears into the air.

Her frail body
crashes to the ground.
On hands and knees,
she gazes up at you
with hollow eyes.
Brightness stolen.

She lifts her head,
kisses death on the cheek.
Her fists and clench the earth
as dirt embeds in her fingernails.

Her snow white skin,
 absorbs the melody of our world,
the souls of those who’ve gone before her.

Her seductive voice,
belts out half notes, quarter notes, sharps, and flats.

Reviews

[umeus]

good read
but the first stanza a bit awkward
may I suggest -

she belts out half notes,
quarter notes, sharps, and flats,
that surround and bound her body
in a hemp rope

play with it ?

also - delete her at third like of stanza six

and final stanza -

Her seductive voice,
belts out half notes,
quarter notes, sharps, and flats.

I would dump all punctuation
it does not serve you

just some ideas for you

[Elle Cee]

Wow. Powerful work there.

[Desiree Swendsen]

thank you very much :)