7. Blank Space

The coffee aroma was strong and soothing. Small amounts of vapour poured out of the cups that sat in front of Scarlett and Dalton as they were placed across from each other at a small, round table. Words were scarce, but they weren’t absent. Dalton held himself well, averting his gaze so that it went anywhere that didn’t meet Scarlett’s. She held herself up, trying to camouflage her shaking, divert it so that it was a case of chattering teeth rather than twitching arms.  Words were absent for a few moments. A sip of coffee, and another. The warm taste melted and soothed, but it didn’t do very much.

                “Dalton?”

                “Yeah?”

                “Why did you want to see me all of a sudden?”

                “I just… I missed you, that’s all. Am I imposing on something?”

                “No. N-no. I just. I kind of felt like I annoyed you, that you were avoiding me. I was just afraid to ask and make it worse…”

                “Oh no I wasn’t doing that at all.” He wasn’t being untruthful; he never avoided Scarlett. She just never confronted him, but neither of them had a good idea on whether that justified their distance. It was always a cop out to assume that some things aren’t meant to be.

                “That makes me feel better,” said Scarlett, “but then, what has been going on?”

                “It’s been rough at home, with my parents getting a divorce and all. I haven’t been sleeping, we’re being forced out of our house and my stepdad has gone insane locking himself inside it…” Dalton shrugged. “It’s just an overall bad situation.”

                Their coffee was gone but they spent the next 90 minutes in the same seats anyway, sometimes talking, but mostly just pondering. They’d never tried it before, but they knew that they were in the presence of someone else who would understand.  Scarlett and Dalton, the two of them could discuss the complex ideas that torment them, and they would both understand. So it was bound to happen, sometime.

---

                “Imagine this,” Dalton started out. “You’re alone in a vast white space of nothingness. You know that no matter how far you travel, no matter what you do, everything will be the same white space, and that you are the only one that exists inside it. Would the lack of danger comfort you, or would the solitude drive you insane?”

                “I don’t really know. I mean, I would probably go insane, I think too much as it is and there are things to distract me, so without that I don’t know how my mind would fare. I would probably break down because I can’t understand /why/ I am stuck in this white space, or why it came about in the first place. I’d be so busy trying to rationalize the existence of myself and this white space, that when I didn’t come to a logical conclusion, I don’t know what I would do.” Scarlett shrugged. “I guess I’m weird like that.”

                Dalton nodded. “No, I could see myself doing that, too. At any rate I wouldn’t be happy if I were stuck in a white plane of nothingness. I guess it would be interesting though, would it be okay if you had never known anything else?”

                Scarlett bit her lip. “I think I would still try to rationalize what I know, even if I didn’t look at my existence in relation to any kind of world, I would still need to rationalize myself and the plane. I think I’m just the kind of person who thinks so much that there’s no escaping being driven insane.”

                Dalton looked at her. “Isn’t that human nature?”

                “I don’t know, I haven’t thought about that part of it yet… I guess I want to know the why of everything around me, but I never really stopped to ask myself why I want to know…”

                “Well that’s counterproductive. You know, there’s one philosopher who said that knowledge without purpose drives you insane. So then he asks the question ‘knowledge for /what/ purpose?”

                Scarlett nodded. “That makes a lot of sense. I think curiosity is my purpose though… I just want to understand the world I’m stuck in.”

                “I do, too.”

                The two of them were approached by the boy cleaning up. “I’m sorry, but we’re closing right now, so you two will have to go.

                Dalton nodded. “Alright, thank you.” He extended a hand to help Scarlett up, and they walked out of the coffee shop together. “Do you want to do anything else?” Dalton asked her.

                Scarlett nodded. “I don’t really know what, though.”

                “Well what do you usually do with your friends?”

                She shrugged. “Just whatever. We go to the park a lot… Sometimes we’ll do really weird things, like dress up in funny outfits and go to the supermarket. Just whatever comes up in our minds, I guess.”

                Dalton laughed to himself. “I’d like to see that. Well I’m not sure how much time we have, but if you want to sit in the park at night again, I’m up for it.”

                “Okay. Should we meet at the same one?”

                “See you there.”