Fictitious

 

She hurt in every sense

Of the word:

Physically

            Mentally

                        Emotionally

                                    Spiritually

And she could not decide

Which one was worse.

 

The physical pain was torture:

To be afflicted with

Tremors and coughs

Aches and attacks

Until she just wanted to

Curl inside her

400 thread count

Egyptian cotton

Sanctuary –

Just curl up

And be forgotten

By the entire world.

 

But the mental anguish was agony:

She knew,

She knew he was never returning.

He was gone,

Gone forever:

He was no longer hers.

And her mind,

Her beautiful, chaotic mind

Could not begin to fathom

Why he would leave

So suddenly.

 

Emotionally, she became a wreck:

Love, she decided,

Was the bane of humanity.

How could she fall

So hard, so fast

For someone who did not

Even attempt to reach out

To catch her?

It was love, she knew,

Not hate,

That destroyed the world,

Which caused every

Bit of happiness

To be crushed into

Depression.

 

And spiritually she had

Devoted herself

To the man

Who had merely walked away

Without a second glance.

She had attached herself –

Stupidly, ignorantly –

To someone who

Took her love

And threw it back.

Her soul was broken –

Not her heart,

For her heart was a physical organ,

She decided;

No, it was her soul which

Suffered now –

Ripped apart

By the hands

She only wanted to hold.

 

But the most pain

She felt –

The reason she fell

So deathly ill –

Lay in her knowledge

That although she did

Hurt in every sense of the word –

Although she was

Dormant in the bed,

Alone with her

Dying thoughts

Frayed emotions

And broken spirit –

There was no man

Who had caused this pain;

It was all stemmed

From the phantom

Within her mind,

Merely a fictitious figure,

Made up

So she could make some sense

Of why she could not stop

Her shameful, spinning

Spiral downward.

 

Reviews

[Emily B]

Wow! A figment of her imagination. Reminds me of the short stories of Horacio Quiroga. Great job.

[Andromeda]

i love it! In little bits, it reminded me of the Story of An Hour, but it was so original too! My favorite part was the 400 thread count Egyptian cotton sanctuary. for some reason, I just love random details that add imagery like that.

[Ed Rector]

You seem to have many thoughts that could be compressed. It seems like a rant, and altogh rants are good they can become something more powerful when shortened to help emphasize certain things.