Run On Sentences

Run On Sentences

A Poem by Lauren
"

My mouth has a way of saying nothing and everything all at once.

"
And suddenly:
I can’t feel anything but dread and there are shards of glass in my mouth where teeth should be and a sinking heart in a place that used to beat with so much life and I know it is nothing but I feel like the world is going to shatter and I am going to laugh in the midst of it all as I tell myself: one more day, only one more day will I allow myself to feel this way.

© 2014 Lauren


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Reviews

Great job! I could visualize everything in the poem and feel the emotion packed into it! Keep up the great work!

Posted 9 Years Ago


You create places and situation. I could feel the human condition and the want to escape what is coming. I liked how you used the words. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Lauren

10 Years Ago

sorry about the Late reply, but thank you!
Coyote Poetry

10 Years Ago

You are welcome.
Wow...pretty deep.
"...shards of glass in my mouth where teeth should be" makes me want to probe more into what might have just happened...
I like it:)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Lauren

10 Years Ago

Thank you so much!
hey there! great job! i love your choice of words and the way you are able to convey the message. Right, tomorrow, you should start anew! :-)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Lauren

10 Years Ago

Thank you very much!
The whole, "I will start tomorrow" thing. Nicely done. Good job.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Lauren

10 Years Ago

Thank you :)
Oh wow, this is an amazing piece. You can really feel what the character is feeling. Brilliantly well described. :-)

Kaze~

Posted 10 Years Ago


Lauren

10 Years Ago

Thank you!! xxx :)
I'm speechless...beautifully done - wow! Great use of imagery in this, from the shards of glass as teeth. Hard to find a lot of poems that give so much imagery as you did. I applaud you, near perfect poem, loved it! Is this continuing from something?

Posted 10 Years Ago


Lauren

10 Years Ago

Thank you!
And no, I was actually just awake by myself at like 3 am at my friend's house one n.. read more
Cameron Griffith

10 Years Ago

Now you know when to write your next one ;) Ha, but really good!
that was great!!! as a reader i can feel what the character is going through :) great job :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Lauren

10 Years Ago

Thanks so much :)
Justin

10 Years Ago

your welcome, keep it up :)

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355 Views
8 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on December 7, 2014
Last Updated on December 7, 2014
Tags: life, love, sadness, depression

Author

Lauren
Lauren

About
Hi, I'm Lauren! I'm 17 and I've been on this website for 2 years. If you've got any questions feel free to ask - I try to be an open book. Feel free to send me a friend request or Read Requests. I .. more..

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