Pain-Eater

This is one of my favorite poems. It is an epic tale! AP

Just like the drugs that you feed to your brain;
Even your tolerance grows for the pain.
The more that you feel, the more it will take.
So I eat it for breakfast whenever I wake.
Sometimes it hurts, and sometimes I cry.
But the scars will show less as time passes by.

Don't get it twisted.  Therein lies a line.
'Tween the harm from the pain, and the half that's divine.
Just enough makes you tougher, much harder to kill.
It'll strengthen your mind, your skin, and your will.
But at some point, you'll break.  Gotta watch what you eat.
One only takes so much thunder 'fore he's down, six feet deep

Sometimes we'll escape, but it's never at-cost,
Because the running is painful, and we often get lost.
There's no time to stop, and ask for direction,
If your give-it-up muscle is the only one flexin'.
Damn right, the storm hurts when you take it up front,
But the reward is much greater when it's quicker and blunt.
When you run, the storm grows and it spreads like a cancer.
Find the strength. Bear it now.  And you will see it's the answer.
He won't have you for long 'fore he eats you alive.
The scared are caught from behind and the weak won't survive.

As your tolerance grows.  The beast will grow smaller.
But the path won't get shorter if you never get taller.
It will never be easy.  It will only get harder.
If you keep facing forward, you will make it much farther.
You'll know what to expect, and you'll less likely wreck.
So quiet the beast and you'll get his respect.
Once he comes to your side, you will see what's divine.
You'll be quick to react, when it's all on the line.

Pain-eaters are tougher, smarter and stronger.
In the end, circumventing the storm will take longer.
I'll forge on ahead, face the miles head-on.
Your storms don't scare me.  Where I'm from it rains stones.
Once I've made it on through, and you've made it around.
Hope you're able to climb. There's no more level ground.
Thunder rocked through my bones as you just skipped along.
Once we're half-up the mountain, your strength will all be gone.
There's no harness to catch you. You'll fall back to earth.
You'll soon find out just what those dark clouds were worth.

I put the beast on his back, then he helped me up the hill.
But his work's done again.  Again he's ready to kill.
But if you, like I before, tame this terrible beast.
Trudge the mud. Eat the thunder.  Watch the lightnin' cease.
Go find that loud thunder. Eat it up.  Make it through.
You'll get scarred and damp and dirty.  We're all scarred and dirty, too.

But the view here is amazing with the clouds below our feet.
We faced the wrath, and rode the storm. We calmed the hellish beast.
You can see the road that leads to war carved neatly 'round the storm.
When you hear the thunder quiet, a new Eater's being born.
Each beast is bigger than the last; quicker and much stronger.
For each new Eater, thunder grows.  The journey gets much, much longer.
The thunder rocks louder and the lightning strikes bolder.
The mud is much deeper and the rain is much colder.
So take on the nasty journey 'til you eat the storm clear.
Anyone who rode the beast is most welcome here.
The seeds you sow in the mud below flow harvest like a fountain.
So beat the beast, trudge the storm. Make it to us, up the mountain.

Author's Note

JG, 2010

Reviews

[Brian Mason]

This piece has a really organic rhythm to it that a lot of poetry writers never really hit. There's a few places where it snags but its nothing a quick edit won't fix. Its thematically relatable and everyone could apply these words to their own struggle, overall a very nice piece.

[Cerebriation]

Thank you for your awesome review. I'm glad I'm able to provide you work a good read.

[Tricia O'Brien]

Honestly I really don't know what to say. Clearly we share a common "knowledge".
I love the way you write, I read this , I dont even know how many times. I feel it, inside of me due to the "being able to relate" factor.

You're awesome. I also find a lil kick outta the fact you dated this 2010.
Mine, my date, time, ya know...is 4/7/2010

[Thea Fuentebella]

powerful. i feel like i'm reading a work of a famous poet. this one is timeless, dude. excellent job!

[HB]

Ok, now that was more like it! When did you write this one? Also, LOTS of nit picky notes for you, although I'm going to have to come back at another point to drop them off. General notes: excellent job keeping the rhyming intact. I'd like to see this edited down to strike the point home with more force. There's a lot of repetition, which, while the rhyming/wordsmithing is good, it's unnecessarily redundant and somewhat bores the reader as they plow through to find the next awesome section.

Favorite bit: "f**k-this-s**t muscle is the only one flexin"

Like I said, I have a couple of nit-picky bits that I will come back to, and hopefully I can help you pare this down a bit. ^.^

[Lily Mae]

This will touch the hearts and lives of those who read.. you've have penned your emotions well..and it pours out for your readers.. This is deep and raw.. You have a wonderful piece here.. xx

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I understand this too well .. friends .. kin..
You have poured heart and soul into this.
Deep and emotional.

Chloe

[Chris Smith Welshpoetcs]

If only you knew how much I can relate to this, awesome poem my friend.

[Cerebriation]

Thank you. This is one that I worked the very hardest on. It is one of my gems.

[Emily]

I really liked it.Somehow this poem reminded me of Dr.Seuss' writings.This poem would be a demented Dr.Seuss homage.It really does feel like you've survived it,and you're helping me along.The emotion is clear.Even though there was swearing in it,which I wouldn't use,I like it.:) Excellent job!