A bad day indeed!

Short Dark Simple Fiction

My day started off bad and only got worse. It was a Monday (of course) and I woke up late with a dark trepidation.  I am not psychic I just always wake up on Mondays with a dark trepidation.  I progressed into the shower and turned on the water.  It was Ice cold as the faucet seemed to be stuck.  Lathering myself up quickly I rubbed the soap from my eyes and accidentally dislodged my last contact from my eye and fell to my knees just in time to watch it swirl down the drain. 

 

20 expletives later I was backing out of my driveway when my back tire hit a small bump.   I stopped and got out to investigate and noticed that I had run over a small kitten. Its white fur limp and faux rhinestone collar glittering in the sunlight.   I looked around quickly then took mittens inside and placed its zip locked carcass in the freezer.   This might sound callus,  but I have two large German Sheppard’s, and the price of dog treats can be astronomical.  

 

30 expletives later, I was on my way down the deserted highway, driving with one eye closed so the road would not be as fuzzy, when my car hit a rather large bump.   Once again I parked and got out to investigate.   Wedged beneath my left tire was a dead man. Obviously homeless as his clothing and cardboard sign stated “Homeless, on my way to Michigan, need a lift”   Not anymore buddy, I said under my breath as I heaved him into my trunk.   I checked his pockets for Identification and found that his name was Thomas and looked like Tom had only about 1.50 in change to his name.    Not even enough for a Starbucks but that’s ok I was late already.  

 

 

In a foul uncaffinated state, I careened into work about an hour late. Greeting me at the door was my new supervisor, Shelly.   With a condescending smile and sing song tone she reminded me that (here) we start work on time at 8:00.  Pronouncing her words slowly as if I were sli-ghtly de-af and need-ed to read lips to help me un-der-stand.  

 

I smiled back in sweet acquiescence and silently wished I had more room in my trunk.

 

Shelly is one of those people for whom the term (A*****e) takes on a decidedly feminine meaning. A petty perfumed tyrant with a pasted enduring smile that never quite reaches the eyes.  You know, one with an invisible stick so far up her a*s that she literally walks funny.

 

I console my self with the inevitable fact that I soon will be her boss, just a fact.

As I dredge through the backwards time warp of the next 8 hours.

 

I finally get home and call over my sister … who else can you call to help dispose of a homeless Thomas, but family.   I had just stripped him when I hear a knock on my door.   I opened it and told my sister not to freak out, but there is a dead man in my kitchen and I need your help.  Yeah right she started to say opening the door wider but was cut off in mid sentence as her jaw dropped comically like a cartoon taking in the sight on my kitchen floor.  

 

 

30 minutes later she was still composing herself so I gave her an option, you can either help me with this or go down to Wal-Mart and pick up my new contacts.   She opted to pick up the contacts.  

 

It took all night and although I tried to think of something religious to say over good ole Tom, in my agitated state the only prayer that came to mind was the sacrilegious quip that my aunt as a teenager used to say when it was her turn to say grace under the watchful disapproving eye of my devout catholic grandmother, “Good food, good meat, good God, lets eat”

 

Certainly not appropriate in this circumstance. 

 

 

 I missed Monday night football but my task was finally finished and I was able to get some sleep.  What an awful day. On the bright side I have enough dog food to last a month, Monday is over at least for this week and I can think of one person that had a much worse day than I. 

 

Reviews

[bluessadmood]

Oh I dont know ,but if this was for real ,then i would say you were leading quite an exciting life,full of adventures,ha ha
I will start from the end and assure you that all my days are much worse,if you care to have a look ha ha..I really liked this ,yes sometimes its so weird
like everything goes wrong and all in the same day ,yes i have noticed that..You know its just like a creative writing ,sometimes you start it and the flow
of words go so nice to the end so beautifully ,and other times its just stuck from the beginning and keeps or getting hard times all the while
or like composing a symphony or again a certain write that once you have a certain good beginning,its like by magic the rest comes so in harmony
that it would look great to the very end ,also our life and days we live,just when you said taking a bath and the water ran cold ,i almost knew
that things will crumble one after the other,there must be a secret in this ,or its just our brains,wants to have a good start ,and if not ,it will go messing everything
like it works without notice and brings you all the bad luck you ever need for one day that will look like forever ..
I really enjoyed this as most your writing are so exciting and lovely to red..
Lovely write..

[SR Urie]

Donna.
I thought I had some bad days. You're very good at writing and in essence cracking me up. I bet you're fun to party with! BZ