Silverware

 

The other night the television news reported that Bernie Madoff still had a set of silverware that was worth $65,000.00 and they want to take that away too.

 

Bernie started his investment firm back in 1960 with $5000.00 that he saved working a few summers as a lifeguard.  If, instead of starting an investment company, he had just left the $5000.00 in the savings bank it would have been worth just about $79,928.00 forty-nine years later in 2009.  More than enough to buy the silverware!

 

Of course, he must have paid the city of New York taxes on the silverware of about 8% unless he bought the set on E-Bay to avoid the taxes.  Then there is the silver polish and the illegal aliens he must have paid to clean the silverware over the years.  He probably has paid insurance on the silverware and keeps it locked up in a safe that must have cost thousands.  All that considered, it looks like the silverware is a loser and he probably should be allowed to keep it or get a government bailout to cover the loss in value.

 

On the other hand, it would seem that Bernie is in deeper do-do for trying to run off with sixty-five billion ($65,000,000,000.00) of his investors dollars.

 

Bernie’s net worth was recently described by the government as $800 million dollars.  This all means that in the 49 years he ran the company he must have blown about three and a half million dollars a day equaling more than sixty-four billion dollars! 

 

Do you think he purchased 984,000 additional sets of silverware at $65,000 each with their money?

 

Duh… I don’t think so.

Reviews

[Ellen Hammond]

An interesting read! It seems Bernie started out on a good foot....he worked and saved his money to start his own business. But, alas, once those big bucks start rolling in so does temptation. The bigger the bucks, the greater the temptation, and the weaker the will to resist. What's a poooor guy to do? lol

I really like the touch of irony and humor you write with, my friend. Enjoyed reading this article.

[hyancynthstofeedthysoul]

I am reminded of a saying, "The louder he spoke of his honor. The faster we counted the spoons."

[Gandré]

I laugh, Donn, great article. Loved it! So informative and great parody.