Soldier of One

 

Blog: A weblog

 

Weblog: A website that displays in chronological order the postings by one or more individuals and usually has links to comments on specific postings.

 

Its funny how we have grown with technology and instead of keeping a journal we post things on a website that normally we would only put in a diary for our own personal viewing.

 

Ive always been the type that keeps going no matter what. Do whatever it takes to get the job done and never hold back or let regrets get in the way. Im a solder that will keep fighting till the day he dies. I dont need anyone to survive. I will push on to be the best I can be as long as there is an ounce of strength left in my body. The world is full of hurdles and setbacks that only make someone like me stronger. They only make me colder and give me the strength to fight harder.

 

A relationship is nothing more then a mere obstacle that gets in the way of success and brings you down. It can change you into something you are not and make you forget why you fight so hard. But sometimes there comes a time in a solders life when he must stop and ask himself, what am I fighting for? What is all the pain and suffering for? You can fight about money, religion, whos right and whos wrong, who is more organized and who carries most of the weight on our shoulders. A soldier of the military fights for our rights, our freedom and our safety. But why? Why must he put his life in danger, keep pushing on when others would normally quit, and most of all bare the burden that most people do not want to deal with? Simple, because he can. I am a soldier of life. I can do things better then most people and others can do things better then I ever will. Somewhere along the way I forgot why I was fighting. Why some days it feels like the whole weight of the world is on my shoulders left for me and only me to handle. Why I should have to be the solid foundation of the family and take on all the problems single handedly. Simple, because I can.

 

Somewhere in the battle I forgot why I push myself to the limits. I have forgotten why we endure so much pain and grief and put up with one another even though deep down we know we dont have to. Somewhere in the battle small arguments cast shadows over the many years of love and make us forget about the end results. Many years from now I can look back with the person I love and say, "It was a tough life, but we made it and it was well worth it". Or I can die alone, patting myself on the back at what a good job I did. What is the point of fighting so hard and struggling with the ever so confusing thing we call life, if after all is said and done you cant remember what you were fighting for.

 

I am a soldier. The battle may have been lost, but I will not loose the war. I do not want to die alone. I will do whatever is takes to love and be loved back no matter what. For awhile I lost my way, but thanks to someone showing me that love can sometimes be hindered by the little things, its starting to come back to me again. For this, I thank you.

 

I am a soldier who does not want to die alone.

 

 

Reviews

[Kriminal]

Your words and thoughts are inspirational. It seems calm, almost as if defeated yet that inner strength begins to shine and reminds us how we can be "an army of one" as the recruiters say.

[Ed Hart]

decades ago, in the midst of my "soldiering", i looked around (mostly into history) and saw that there were people who had lived 'large' lives, people who made a difference, people who had experienced life so differently from my own, it was almost like we were from different dimensions...when i looked into my tiny life, i felt cheated until i realized i was cheating myself...then i went on a quest...and it has made all the difference...soldiering is what we do before we go on a quest...then we become warriors...ed

[Leslie Thompson]

thanks for sharing your diary page.... i love the way you addressed things we all face...
great write

[Raef C. Boylan]

This is a thoughtful write - at first about a more or less globally relevent subject (how technology is changing life on a daily basis) - and then about a subject universal to all conscious creatures (struggle with life).

I don't know if i would call it a prose poem, as it seems more like an essay or blog entry - however i'm not sure what the technical conditions defining a prose poem are, so it probably is one. It's prose, at least.

Thanks for posting this.

p.s.
I can't tell if apostrophes have been left out of this deliberately or not?
"Its funny", "Ive" "Im", "whos right and whos wrong", "cant" etc.

"will not loose the war" (lose)