An ancient love story

An ancient love story

A Poem by 外人 (Gaijin)
"

Inspired by a Brazilian soap opera (Gabriela, a soap opera that takes place in the '20s), decided to write about love stories the way they used to be ... how I wish I could live one of them :(

"
Bring me back to the time when for my fair true love,
I'd recite my love poems,
fearless, to her parents I'd
ask permission to court her, yes I hope they'd say.

Bring me back to the time when for my happiness,
I'd walk her through the city
hand by hand, under the moon
I'd dare to ask her a kiss and true love we'd share.

Bring me back to the time when for my fair true love,
enormous respect I'd have,
her body'd be a temple,
unavailable 'till God gives us its blessing.

Bring me back to the time when for my happiness,
I'd make it all official,
on my knees I'd ask her to
be mine, with the most beautiful engagement ring.

© 2012 外人 (Gaijin)


Author's Note

外人 (Gaijin)
I decided to focus on metrica this time, no rhymes, this time I focused only on creating 12-7-7-12 syllables stanzas. Love or hate it?

My Review

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Featured Review

I liked it, it brings back the simpler times where men had honor an loyalty. Also, it seemed very mature for a teenager. An being a teenager myself, I gotta say. Very good job hun. I hope to hear more poetry from you, an would like a review of some of my own poetry.

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

外人 (Gaijin)

12 Years Ago

Thank you very much for your compliments, your review was very appreciated :) Though, I have more th.. read more
~FALL3N-ANG3L~

12 Years Ago

Your welcome, an thank you. (: Have a good day now.



Reviews

So sweet and beautiful! It's amazing! You showed what true love is to you and it turned out so good, your words are really mature and I really enjoyed reading this!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Love this. Oh the beauty of the old fashioned ways. Wonderfully captured.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this is a nice change up. Well constructed and thoughtful prose poetry

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

外人 (Gaijin)

11 Years Ago

This is written in verses, they just don't rhyme,
I've focused on the metrica (12-6-6-12 each .. read more
Every girl and every father wants this in their life.A respectful son in law and a loving husband

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

外人 (Gaijin)

12 Years Ago

Thx =D
You wrote an universal love story. Ancient is a relative word.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It's so beautiful. :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I liked it, it brings back the simpler times where men had honor an loyalty. Also, it seemed very mature for a teenager. An being a teenager myself, I gotta say. Very good job hun. I hope to hear more poetry from you, an would like a review of some of my own poetry.

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

外人 (Gaijin)

12 Years Ago

Thank you very much for your compliments, your review was very appreciated :) Though, I have more th.. read more
~FALL3N-ANG3L~

12 Years Ago

Your welcome, an thank you. (: Have a good day now.
This is lovely poetry. I like the story it tells, and how you expressed it. Great job. :-)

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This is fabulous stuff, I like your attention to syllable use and the clasical feel to it, it reminds me somehow of Petrarch.

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

外人 (Gaijin)

12 Years Ago

Oh Gosh ! That's the greatest compliment you could possibly give me ! Telling me I remember you one .. read more
THis is like a love poem. So similar

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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816 Views
20 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 20, 2012
Last Updated on August 20, 2012
Tags: Poem, Love story, Ancient love story, Love, Love poem

Author

外人 (Gaijin)
外人 (Gaijin)

London, United Kingdom



About
Why do I call myself 外人? 外人 is a foreigner, an outsider, therefore we're all, no matter what, 外人. We all live as foreigners in-between two worlds: The wor.. more..

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