Elizabeth's Problem

It's in Elizabeth's POV

 

When I opened the door to my room, I automatically screamed when I saw who, or should I say what, was on my bed. I hadn’t seen anything like it in all my years.

The thing on my bed was maybe 7 feet tall, hairy all over (brown hair-in places you don’t want hair on too!) and, God he smelled! He smelled like chicken gas in a muddy hole! It was the most terrible part, he smelled like a chicken farm and a pig farm put together. He had a human figure dispite his… appearance. Then he spoke to me.

“Hello, my name is Gratinarld. I am the one who turned you into a werewolf. Don’t tell your friend I’m talking to you.”His last sentence sacred me. Why shouldn’t I tell him? “Because it’ll tear him up.” He said that like Elijah was a tiny paper toy, which he definitely isn’t.

“Fine. What are you doing in my bedroom?’ I had to bite my tongue from cusing and cursing. Damn, it was hard.

To tell you about Nathan Hawbaker. He replied in my mind. Why?

What happened to Nate? I asked  curiously to Gratinarld. Oh great, He may answer horridly.

Nathan was attacked by another werewolf at the baseball practice. He’s been missing ever since then. Oh God, I should’ve listened to Elijah. He’ll be heartbroken when he finds out what happened. Poor Nate is either a werewolf or dead. Dead? No, he can’t be dead, he’d live, just like I did, and Elijah did, right?

Elizabeth, there’s no need to worry, Elijah knows. His mother came home crying. He doesn’t know the details. Nathan is alive, but barely. He needs your help. I would’ve talked to Elijah, but he’s in no fit state to do what must done. Nathan is on the verge of death, only you can save him. Woah, a lot to think about, eh?

Author's Note

Okay, so I thought I'd change it up some... Now this chapter's in Elizabeth's POV, instead of that other one that I was doing before... Maybe the next chapter's in Elijah's? Maybe not... Decisions, decisions... I wrote this at school today.

How did you like it?

@Fafa, I hope this is enough action for you...It may not be the kind of action you were hoping for, but that'll be later in the book...

@Jessi, Is this better monologue?

I know it's short, but I needed it to be fast. Can't wait for the next chapter, can you?

Reviews

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

I thought you did a really good job on this chapter. It was entertaining. I love that you meet the person that turned her. OMG I still feel bad for Nate...I think you could tell that Elijah would be torn up inside. The whole thing rests on Elizabeth's shoulders...that's a lot. Can't wait to read on. Thanks for sharing.

[Esther Night]

your being confuseing last chapter was in thrid person, but this one is in frist person. You need to watch that. other that its great !

[Short.Nerd]

I like it:) You have a typo up there^^^

[Coyote Poetry]

A very short and entertaining chapter. A Werewolf waiting for you could turn your day around. I like the knowledge he gave her that she was needed to help her friend. A very good chapter.
Coyote

[Jessi Berlasty]

"His last sentence sacred (scared) me." " He said that like Elijah was a tiny paper toy, which he definitely isn’t (wasn't)."

Much better. A lot more insight of what's going on in your character's head. Now make sure you point out your characters flaw. Not only should she fight outside forces, but herself as well. She seems like this amazing mediator who can reason through a lot of things for other people. And that's a great strength, but also a great weakness. Eventually down the line, she's going to have to try to mediate between two very difficult choices. A lot to chew, but it always makes for wonderful characters.