Insaniam

I wondered what I'd be like to dive into madness. I doubt I could really capture it into words and put it on display for the world to see, but I hope I made a good effort.

There is nothing more addicting than the purity of freedom. For so long I sat bottom of an ocean of falsehoods, entangled in string and doused in black. At some point I lost my vision, admittedly, I  choose to keep my eyes closed. I couldn't believe in anything I saw, for perpetual lies always seemed to have more form than the truth. Day by day the rest of my senses dulled even more; food became flavorless, sounds were muffled, and my sense of smell was nonexistent.

But suddenly at my lowest, you grabbed me by the heart. And what a rough beauty you were. On that moonlit night, your eyes were as dark as the sky, your smile was gorgeously sinister, and yet, inviting. Your hands were absolutely freezing, but I didn't care. I've always found peace in the cold, and in your arms, I was home.

I haven't felt anything of worth for so long I was exploding with emotions. In your embrace, I held the biggest smile in my life with a rather menacing laugh to match, and tears, tears pouring from the depths of my soul. 

Gazing upon you, chills shot up my spine bursting and filling my brain with such a brilliant dark light opening my world to infinite possibilities. I was intoxicated, but I was yours. No longer alone I could breathe with ease again. But mostly importantly, I was free, free to love and hate as I pleased. This world became my playground bound to my whims and it's oh so amusing people were always at my mercy. 

I've always wondered how to define our relationship. Such an odd mix of addiction, fear, anger, and lust. You could always make me laugh from the heart. It is truly exhilarating thinking about our future together, especially now seeing as I believe I have complete control over you. Very brazen me, I know lol. But when I think about all that you've done for me, I just want to collar and chain you to me for eternity. But have no worries, I know I can't tie you down when there are so many more like me waiting to be emptied of the old world and given life anew. So in case you do move on, I want to say thank you. 

With you always standing behind me I am invincible, my once blinded eyes are now sharpened & evolving, and my sins from now until the end are weightless....