The Modern Day Sage

Part 2: Paradoxes of the Sage

 

Detached, yet compassionate; enjoys life, yet does not cling to it; a perfectionist, yet indifferent to success or failure; a man of honor, yet avoids reaping honor; ignores ethics and morals, but lives a life of the highest moral order; does not strive, yet achieves; knows the answers, but prefers to remain silent; has the innocence of a child, but incredible inner strength.

**********

I haven’t been able to find my words as of late. It feels like it’s been years since I have written anything of worth.

Being stuck on an island for two years with the situations I experienced fueled my need to have an emotional outlet and thus revived my writing from the past. Though it appears my feelings since returning to the states have been dulled significantly. In the great words of Albus Dumbledore “words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic…” but as it stands, I feel utterly powerless. I am positioned where exactly I want to be to attain my future endeavors but there is an encompassing void that continues to grow from within me. I take pride in knowing who I am and understanding the complexities of myself, but I’m not so sure this time as to why this is happening now.

In retrospect, it could be a multitude of reasons, from losing friends, a job position, a wife, someone I could actually care for, a dog, or seeing the fleeting last words of those stuck in the war-torn city. But perhaps in light of those events, I think the main thing I’ve lost, and what’s creating this void, is hope. As morbid as it sounds, it’s also not so black and white. I still see my financial and career goals moving forward and me meeting them, yet at this point, it just seems like a given being the person that I am. Of course, that doesn’t mean to say it’s going to be easy, besides, easy is boring. To drag my feet in the mud rather than placing one foot in front of the other to reach the top, that struggle has worth in itself and it’s a path I will continue forth upon. It just seems the future called out to me too early this time and gave me too many spoilers to my story.

I am in rage of events that occur all around me and I wonder how much more of these acts will I endure before I shut out the world completely. But with all good and no bad, there would be no appreciation. With all bad and no good, who would have hope.

So just what the hell is my excuse.

I felt that once I understood my foundation as to why I am the way I am I could gain a clearer insight to this reality, but not even the harmonious paradoxes of the sage seem to illuminate any guidance. Life, for lack of better words, is so f*****g irritating. This mental struggle I’m being tested with will inevitably be one of the great precursors to my growth as a person; such is the burden of knowledge. But to be tested now!

Just when I got away from the things I hated the most, I managed to leave behind the things I loved. 

How poetic, and perhaps one of the cruelest paradoxes of life.  

Author's Note

This will mostly likely be the shortest chapter of this very long book, but I hope many of you can relate, understand, and enjoy this read.

Btw, huge credit to Jos Slabbert from http://www.taoism.net/theway/sage.htm
I appreciate the culmination of information on the Taoist Sages.