Corrode

Corrode

A Poem by dramamine

I am only here for now,
A needless craving building up,
Filling my lungs with toxin and waste,
A taste of bitterness stained on my tongue,
Spitting out my silence on everyone,
This feeling forever feeding my hate,
I am only alive in your decay, 
Bones whispering inside me,
Telling me to just give in,
A corroded body spread out before me,
Numbing my guilt and digging into my skin,
I want to find myself inside you,
I want to sever myself from you,
I want to hide myself for you,
Don´t put your trust in me,
There are parts of me you will never see,
I will only hurt you,
I can never save you,
I am just an empty shell,
Lock my head up inside a cell,
I am just a worthless fool,
Can never fix me with a rusted tool,
A self-loathing liar, caught in a daze of paralyzing bliss,
You never deserved for it to end like this,
I want what I need,
I need what I want...

© 2016 dramamine


Author's Note

dramamine
I wrote this kind of quickly so sorry if it sucks, but anyway please let me know your thoughts, anything would be greatly appreciated.

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

No ,it doesn't suck. Although I think you could've done more with the end. I do this too,I'll write and rewrite and edit and repost..... It's a process. Otherwise it was interesting. Like you said, a quick write but with a little fine tuning it could be a powerful one.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

No ,it doesn't suck. Although I think you could've done more with the end. I do this too,I'll write and rewrite and edit and repost..... It's a process. Otherwise it was interesting. Like you said, a quick write but with a little fine tuning it could be a powerful one.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

'Filling my lungs with toxin and waste'

From some reason, I really like this line!
Keep it up!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This was quite an interesting piece.Everyone feels this way at times.Well I have to confess sometimes I feel this way, maybe thats because I am done with pleasing people.I loved this .Thanks for sharing it with me.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very deep and meaningful. There are many many things you could get from this due to the complexity and structure of this poem. Well done!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow, this is complex and very powerful, it is written in such a way that you can interpret the cause of the ailment so it could anything from depression to cancer. I really like dark poetry, not everything in life has a happy ending and this showcases that face. Bravo! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

"Bones whispering inside me,
Telling me to just give in,
A corroded body spread out before me,
Numbing my guilt and digging into my skin,"
I love that stanza. Fast write or not it's an honest share of emotions... I enjoyed it my friend :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

304 Views
6 Reviews
Rating
Added on January 4, 2016
Last Updated on January 4, 2016
Tags: life, death, sad, hate, regret, darkness

Author

dramamine
dramamine

The Shire



About
You can call me Twiggy.I'm just a 16 year old girl. With no friends so I spend my time writing s****y tales, poetry, and listening to music. I hope to one day become a musician and you know start a ba.. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


OFF TO THE MALL OFF TO THE MALL

A Poem by Bear