Random

Uneasy,
I'm thinking of you,
I can't sleep,
Your all that's on my mind,
I can't stop moving,
I need you now,
I can't wait to see you,
I'm sorry,
For being annoying,
Are you okay,
I'm scared,
I want to be with you,
I need to be with you,
Am I too clingy,
I'm dying now.

Author's Note

There was a jumble on my mind, so I wrote everything down that was in my mind now so I'm hoping for sleep now that I wrote this.

Reviews

[Lindsey]

I enjoyed it. It reminded me a little of myself. I tend to cling but there is a good reason for it. It may be a random jumble but it's pretty good. I hope you can get some sleep now. Dream well.

[S Sanders]

I'm new here, so don't mind me:-) If this were to be revised, I'd chop out a few extra words. Yep, I'm a minimalist--go figure. Something like: Uneasy/thinking of you/Can't sleep/You're all that's on my mind. Etc. I also agree with the other reviewer on the next to last line. Maybe: Am I too clingy? Then: I'm dying now. This evokes lots of emotion, and I can definitely feel it here. Hope you finally got some sleep:-)

[GamingGal]

Pros: I can definitely feel the need behind this poem. Your emotion all but seeps through your words. It's short, but so much feeling is packed into it, that the shortness intensifies all these feelings. It's kind of scary because it reminds me of the times I've felt this, and I don't want to remember those times.

Cons: Just a suggestion, in the second to last line where you ask "Am I too clingy" perhaps end it with a "?" instead of a comma.

Overall: I love this and shun it at the same time. Not shun it because it is bad, but shun it because it's so good that the emotions seep into me and I feel them and feel the ones I've locked away. It takes a lot to get such a reaction from me. So, good job.