Realization comes late

"Go on then but remember,

its dark out there...”

 

If only I stopped to hear.

 

I rushed instead,

Lured by the beauty.

Nonetheless a decaying heart...

 

If only I could be torn apart.

 

“Leave her” whispers through the air,

And I did so…

Drifted away mentally;

 

If only I wouldn’t have changed radically.

 

For realization comes late,

Probably to mock the decided fate.

And then sets in an unknown fear…

 

IF ONLY I CARED TO HEAR

Author's Note

This one is my first attempt to poetry...and i know it sucks...

But still tell me how you feel...criticizemto your heart's content

Reviews

[Parimal Pratyush]

No it does not suck! Perhaps the only point that put me off.
The vision is outstanding.
Often we listen to voices that leave us lost and often hurt the ones who love us.

"For realization comes late,
Probably to mock the decided fate."

I mean wow. This is deep and absolutely beautiful in many ways.

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks Parimal...I thought not to share it at first...had no confidence on my first poem...but then just shared it...pleasure that you enjoyed this

[Ruth]

It is human nature to not hear...until we learn, be kind to yourself and as for the poem, it is well written and thought out, does not suck at all x

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thank you Poopy for the nice review

[An owl on the moon]

This is deep journey into choices of the heart... the wishing and wondering... Only hope you'll stay at the Cafe and share so much more. :)

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks Craig...great to know you liked it...and as of the Cafe, I’ll be here for Iong :)

[Sami Khalil]

Well written and conveyed. You did sooooo good...:)......................

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks again Sami...was really confused if i should post it here..but then posted since this is a forum to get reviewed honestly...

[Sami Khalil]

Wow. You are welcome...:)........

[Brendan McCallum]

Very good for a first attempt, I would have started it with L5 and kept it tight after that, also a tad too much ordinary language, the more we write the better we get so don't give up... Bren

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks Bren

[gameoverman]

The imagery is outstanding and i can relate to it in a way so yes,it is good and no it does not suck. I really want to see more poetry from you so keep writing.

ps your story "forlorn " was also good
ps

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thank you very much...will try on more poetry

[Mac8]

Doesn't suck at all. Very poetic, nice job! I as a reader I can relate to what you are trying to express.

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks a lot...if it is undesrtandable as a reader, it means a lot to me as the writer...glad you enjoyed it

[Geo Lawrence]

this is ok chap. it does not suck. poignant...

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks mate for the review

[Avinash]

Its a really commendable one which cautions one in the matters of heart. Rightly so but there is no other way to grow emotionally and spiritually. A life without love may sound and appear peaceful from outside but without turbulence there is never anything gonna happen. Choice is yours if you are ready for the ride. :) Success and failure like all other things are never going to be in your hand.

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks Avinash...choice is definitely our's to make but yet as it goes with us we surrender a true love (not only for the soulmate but for any relationship) often and go for the one which is apparantly beautiful but heartless...and then we regret, mostly at a time when it is too late to come back..

[Avinash]

True then it depends on you how you identify that. Truth or Maya ;)?

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Exactly...this truth is actually the realization that comes late...Maya is most of the time interesting though ;)

[hardeep sabharwal]

Realization comes late,,
what a nicely penned piece here,, and a nice expression,, thank you for sharing :)

[Dipanjan Dutta]

Thanks Hardeep...glad that you found it nice