With Liberty and Justice for All

My Honors American Literature "Your Voice" Project

With Liberty and Justice for All

A Memoir

 

I remember the sky was gray, a dreary time in February. Everything was quiet, in that sense of routine kind of way.  Dad was at work, like he usually was in the morning. 

 

Nothing seemed out of place; but it would take only a moment, a single nick in the routine fabric of our neatly-knit lives, for our entire world to unravel.

 

 

I couldn’t decide how I wanted to describe my feelings on America, and how it made me who I am. Most people who know me, know that I have very unpatriotic feelings and views on America as a nation, and don’t feel any certain pride in being American. However, a lot of people don’t understand why I feel the way I do about the nation as a whole.

 

My parents both believe in physical discipline. They have never abused me or my siblings in any way, even though we received whoopings when they were deserved. When I was six years old, in February of 2002, my three siblings and I were removed from our home under the false pretense that my father beat us, and our mother, and that we were in immediate danger. We had no bruises, we had no scars, my mother adamantly protested that he did not beat her, but they took us anyway. That day affected my life in many ways, if solely from the power of memory, and is partly why I feel the way I do about this nation and its faults.

 

I remember that the officers were looking everywhere, even in our backyard, while a mean-looking man talked to my mom. Being five, my understanding of the conversation was mostly taken from the facial expressions.

 

            What are you doing? Why are you here? Who are you?

 

Those were the words that my mothers face screamed so loudly above the words she was actually saying to the man. One of the men, the quiet one who didn't say much, told her that we had to leave with them.

 

That was when the 'uh-oh' alarm sounded off in my head.

The baby was a month old, to the day, but they still took him away. My sister was nearly one, my brother was edging towards three, and I was making my way to five. The eldest of the kids and even I couldn't understand what was happening.

I remember how my brother and sister cried when we got into the men's white van; it had a huge gold badge on the side of it, just like the officer's uniforms. I remember how the baby slept blissfully through the whole commotion. I remember how I couldn't comfort my brother or sister, I couldn't tell them it was okay, because I didn't know that it was.

The one word that could sum up that entire day for me was, confusing. I was five years old, and I’d never left home overnight for anything other than a sleepover at my grandmother’s house. And these men, who I’d never seen before in my life, were telling me I had to leave with them.

 I don’t remember crying that much over it to begin with. I remember being quiet, though. I don’t think I really knew how to handle what was happening. It was like something out of a Law & Order episode; except we didn’t have an Olivia coming to the rescue. 

Have you ever seen a foreign film, with no subtitles? The feeling you get when you don’t understand something that seems so important to those around you, but you can’t figure it out no matter how hard you try- That was the feeling I had.

 When I watch our old home videos, I seemed like a happy kid, even after the whole fiasco. My siblings didn’t seem to be depressed or scarred, but I chock that up to the fact that our parents made sure we knew it wasn’t our fault, and that by God’s grace, we didn’t experience many things that would have a serious negative impact on us.

I am now sixteen years old. I am successful at what I do, because my parents were persistent in raising my siblings and me to be successful. They didn’t let that road bump stop them from leading their family, and they fought for us. My father studied, literally overnight, as much law as he possibly could to represent himself. They settled the case for a few thousand dollars. When I turn eighteen, in two years, I will represent my own case, and I will not settle. My siblings will do the same when they turn eighteen.

 

While America is a good nation, and a respectable one, it is not without sin. I see so many people who adamantly oppose any threat to the U.S., but the only resolve they seek is to blow up anyone who attempts to cross national safety, to protect the borders from emigrants because ‘they do not belong’, and to deny the rights of people simply because they don’t love the way the majority does.

 

America does not live up to it’s heightened reputation. America is no longer a melting pot, but a pot of old oil that refuses to mix with anything that touches it. America is a place where everyone is accepted, except those who are not. This nation was built on the backs of one body of people, and the graves of another, a fact that so many choose to deny ever occurred.

 

I cannot justify, within myself, holding this nation above any other. America is supposed to be a nation, with liberty and justice for all. Not liberty and justice for all but gays, Blacks, Mexicans, Muslims, and whomever else this nation chooses to frown upon.

 

I have no certain pride or nationalism in being American. I do understand, and appreciate, that I have many opportunities because I am American. But many people paid the cost to get me what I have, and because of that it doesn’t feel right to simply revel in my luxuries. I would never do anything to endanger my nation, or the people in it. But just as such, I will never fight for my nation, or its people.

 

I am American, but above that, I am Teralyn Renea Evans, eldest daughter of Charles and Nicole Evans. And that’s all that I need to be.

Reviews

[Ami N.]

Wow.
I'm not going to go with my usual "this was amazing" or "beautiful" or whatnot, because…well, this is the reality. And not all of reality is beautiful or amazing. This really astounded me. The determination you have, the strength to stand up for what you know is right, the fact that you don’t let anyone influence you – this is what makes you who you are Teralyn.

And I really really admire you for that.