YOUR LOVE IS GONE

A Poem by Digvijay Singh

It's gone now. Gone Somewhere far.

Forgotten, erased or just left behind.

Like a sunken ship

That now rest on the dark bed

Being eaten day and night

Being taken inch by inch

Like the night i remember

The whispers that we told

Or Stories we unfold.

Moon of that night

Your lips or the wine

But All Gone now

Like some monsoon that was last

And like all wave goes to sea,

Your love is gone.

© 2019 Digvijay Singh

My Review

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Reviews

barleygirl

I love the way you write this to show the feelings of heartbreak & abandonment, but also expressing yourself creatively (which I prefer to a rant). It seems like you are a good observer of how your own feelings come over you, so that you can put this into words realistically. You could pump up a few of your words to convey more imagery. First, I think you mean "sunken" ship. And the sunken ship rests on a "dark bed" -- this could be more imaginative, such as possibly describing it as a rusted hulk covered in crawling sea creatures. "Like the night I remember" is a flat way to say this. Try to spice up your writing with imagery . . . here's an example: "Like the night that sears a hole in my brain" . . . another phrase of yours "all gone now" . . . could be more intense: "ripped away now" . . . of course you will put these kinds of things into your own words, in your own way. These are just quick examples to show possibilities. Thanks for considering my comments. I know most poets do not like to rip apart a piece of work that's already done & posted. I only mean my comments as ideas for future writing (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie