Northern Star

 Northern Star

 

I need a break

Give me a break

Give me a cure

Give me something

 

I can’t do this

I’m striving for words

I’m lost in anxiety

I’m drowning in my mind

 

I don’t know what way to act

I don’t know how you want me to

I don’t know what you expect

I don’t know why you won’t just tell me

 

I’m drugged

I’m poisoned

I’m unattached

I’m alone

 

Stop eyeing my body

Stop judging my face

Can’t you see the aching inside

The sharp stabs of pain

The nausea

The desperation

 

I can’t do this alone

I can’t do this at all

You don’t understand

I can’t explain it

 

These cheery bright lights

The flashing of the season

My cheeks are too heavy to lift

My mouth is too numb to smile

 

I’m your child

I’m your baby

But to everyone else

I’m a grown woman

A sick grown woman

 

Help me get better

Help me meet your expectations

Because I’m confused

And I don’t know which way to go

Which way I should

Which way is better

The way that leads me

Closer to you 

Author's Note

Those close to me may have noticed that I haven't been too active lately, in fact, I haven't touched my laptop much in the past week or so. Which means I haven't written anything in quite some time.

Tell me what you think about this poem, I haven't said any of these words out loud, so I wrote them down.

Enjoy

Reviews

[B-poet]

Feeling a bit unattached to your significant other can have you taking a right turn down break-up avenue unless you get the right directions for making it back too lovers lane. Nice job here. :)

[Malcolm J. Watt]

A good description of frustration with some one who appears to not care.

[Ahmad Cox]

Its amazing how you were able to convey such strong emotions and feelings through this poem and I could feel your heart and pain in this piece.

[Tex]

I loved it. Great title, a contrast to the lostness (if I may coin a word) of the write. I liked the repetitiveness of the first words in your first 4 stanzas... it was a brilliant way to illustrate the mind numbness you talk about in the write. and this:

My cheeks are too heavy to lift
My mouth is too numb to smile

just a wonderful description of depression... to tiered and week to smile... perfect... you caught the effects of a deep depression perfectly there.

I must say I am sorry you have this knowledge. but you expressed it wonderfully.

the last stanza tells us this young woman will still be dealing with depression in her future.

great write. 100/100

[Destinyxi]

Thank you so much for your review haha. I love long reviews :P

[Tex]

:-D

[ℰmerald ⚓]

This is depressing, deep emotions..you should probably tell you're mom or dad which ever parent this is to, how you feel. It may not have the best results but at least there will be change, right?

[Destinyxi]

Right. Thanks for your review

[ShaunMosley]

So I wonder have you told your mom how you felt?

[black.butterfly]

She's confused but she's alive. She reaches a destination by voicing her pain out. A very haunting piece.

[Destinyxi]

Thank you :)

[Jordan's Back]

This piece is so relatable to me. Everyone needs to know they are loved by their parents, but be glad you have some. I will never get to have closure with mine...

[Destinyxi]

I'm sorry =/ Thanks for your review

[Jordan's Back]

Dont be sorry, I loved the poem :)

[Destinyxi]

I'm glad :)

[KAOlmsted]

No matter how old we get, we still need to feel that connection to our parents. When the parent doesn't understand the child, that is where true frustration is born...I sincerely hope you get well, and I hope your support system realizes its role in the healing, for your sake, very soon. Thank you for sharing this with us.

-kimmer

[Destinyxi]

That's true. Thanks for reviewing!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Well I am guessing anorexia nervosa. To be a parent on the other side is a desperate and lonely and disabling experience. Like with many psychological issues, often the 'sufferer' has the power. Often until they decide to stop blaming others or their life or their 'faults' nothing changes and everyone feels helpless.

[Destinyxi]

thanks for your review