not sure

Are we going to write off our love,

concluding

that our wishes were wasted prayers

thrown hopelessy into thin air.

 

 

Reviews

I really like how you're playing with ambiguity here. The ending is lofty, makes the reader think about it some. And some more too. Let me show you something good that you did with the ending. In the ending, you could have said flatly:

that our wishes were wasted prayers
thrown hopelessy into [the sky]

but by doing this it would simply be a noun, something very concrete. This would not be anything special. But instead, you say:

that our wishes were wasted prayers
thrown hopelessy into [thin] air.

The word [thin] here is an adjective and helps dig into the ambiguity of air. So while you could have said [sky], you chose the action form, and created a more wonderful and thoughtful poem, and very simply too.
Poems are in need of action. Very nice job.

[M.Kilani]

Just like an infidel’s prayer
Who disbelieves in god
Don’t wish for what’s not there
For wishing is a fraud
http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/Kilani/528115/

[Crinkle°]

so beautifully heartbreaking...

[Poetry Girl]

its really small and doesnt say much, but it makes me wonder

[Honestly, Abe]

I definitely love your comment here about the useless habit people have of "wishing" for love to be successful, instead of working for it. I relate with the hopelessness described.

[Robin]

excellent portrayal of a crossroad moment in life and a relationship

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Certainly sums up how it feels when love crumbles... short but straight to the emotional grip.

[Randolf Ramos]

Are we going to write off our love,

concluding

that our wishes were wasted prayers

thrown hopelessy into thin air.



__________Great poem, short but bears human emotion.

This is imbued with thousands of meaning.