Wrong Awakening

inspired by art

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tower reflects human spirits
as objects
trees crowded out
by buildings
human minds connected
to machines

 

Metamorphosis of meaning
dissolution of spirit
death
disintegration
metropolis of decay

 

Trapped within their own creations
even in sleep she cries out for release

 

Bright clouds bring hope for your escape
concrete cracked by unseen armies
roots of trees patiently strangle
machines that were wrongly awakened
freedom arrives slowly

 

Author's Note

Inspired by the artwork shown titled "Wrong Awakening" by Peter Gric.

Reviews

[R J Askew]

Ach, you capture my daily reality here. I work in London's Canary Wharf, which is a collcetion of towers. I think of them as egos. They are all straight lines of glass and steel and power. My place in all this is in the middle of a room some distance from a window, which never opens, can't open. All I can see from it when I look that way are other buildings. I can see nothing natural an I can't see the sky. This is no way to be. And my mind is linked to the machine in front of me. And I sometimes wake at night thinking about it. Ach, you capture my daily reality in my less than lovely tower, no ivory in sight.

[613]

First & foremost, what a brilliant picture! It truly captured the heart of the poem.

As for the poem itself, what a wonderful job. It flowed very well. One of my favorites on here for sure. Well done.

- Brittney

P.S. If you wouldn't mind checking out my novel, HIM, I'd truly appreciate it. I'm looking to have it published but won't do so until I get as much feedback as I feel necessary. (:

[A. Amos]

Amazing subject you picked and you wrote elegantly every single verse is true, the world need more writers like you and same time the whole world should read your work...keep up the good work. Respect!

[Simon Welsh]

Freedom is never a certainty unless you think say something without being attacked. I like.

[Gomer LePoet]

This makes me think of the Star Trek "Borg" species, where human feelings are a long ago forgotten gift. There are many here that still have those feelings but it seems more and more a machine-like coldness is taking hold. miss your face Dreamer. :)

[poetry-kiddo alienbaba]

yes its fine D.D a bit diff from ur usual poetry buthere you were tied to another's work so the new approach i guess.

[Robin]

wrong awakening indeed , civilization will be the death of us ...

[Arielle Ann]

I misread the title as "strong awakening" but on rereading, it was "wrong awakening"...the title itself changes the whole essence of the write...its as if something wrong has happened, but would soon be wiped away since its just a glitch in the normal routine....the words bring a positive aroma to your lines, as if whatever is happening can be dismissed as a mere error! wonderful!

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

DD this is a powerful poem . So true it is... you really found great inspiration in this oddly lovely picture.

Chloe

[Ruth]

It so does and this is wonderfully portrayed here :)
We have become nothing more than ghosts in this chaotic material world...gazes turned away...forgotten what is important...
You always make me think love
♥

[Alicia Beavis]

Interesting poem about the way technology is really taking over the world. I like how, in the end, you leave an image in the readers mind of the 'trees' or nature revolting and claiming back what we've taken from it. Nicely done.