So what do we think? When we bother at all. Of staying in straight
lines? Following the uniform in
front? Followed uniformly
behind? Up marble steps hollowed
down by those before, Past sleeping lions
heroically carved to guard… What? From whom? Taken in perspective,
all lines converge. Until the mind - that
willing fool - Begins its urging. First
quietly, in seditious whisper: “Yes, this is real,
real. Simply reach out and touch to feel.” So convinced, we break
away, slip beneath the velvet rope, Past guards lost in
stuporus dreams of cigarettes and coffee. We know! Truly know what
depth is there. That hands may feel what
eyes may see, So we reach, reach, Reach until suddenly, surprised fingers are stopped. Stopped short by the
grain of brush strokes, Stopped by the taunt
bounce of canvas. Then, oh then, there is
the slow walk back Back into place Then there is the
mourning, Mourning that unnamed
thing, lost. Lost forever by the act
of discovery.
I've read this a few tines trying to take it all in.
First, there's the realization of conformity that breeds discontent.
Then, comes the desire to explore.
The poem suggests that we re fooling ourselves.
Disappointment follows, and disillusionment.
Maybe, it all just seemed so enticing and wonderful in our head?
I appreciate poems that speak of some deep realization - and this one certainly does that.
The imagery used throughout is very vivid and masterful as well.
Posted 3 Years Ago
2 of 2 people found this review constructive.
3 Years Ago
Thanks for reading and for your comments. I had the notion it was a loss of innocence poem pretty m.. read moreThanks for reading and for your comments. I had the notion it was a loss of innocence poem pretty much.
This one really speaks to me... as in life I have become convinced that there are truths which cannot be understood by seeking them, beauty which is not absorbed by seeking understanding, that words both give expression yet also strip away an element of profundity. As if your every touch brings something to reality, and leaves a fractured dream in its wake. I guess your mistake was letting euclidean geometry dictate the nature of lines and queues... perhaps then the dream would manifest as reality crumbled to your fingertips?
Can I ask what the inspiration was for this poem? The reason I ask is because I relate to different parts of this for different reasons. Discovery and the delight of that discovery is mostly what I receive from this. Really good in that it puts me in a space that I can remember how I felt that way before. Thank you for sharing.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
1 Year Ago
Thank you for your kind and generous comments. I can't recall if there was an exact moment when I f.. read moreThank you for your kind and generous comments. I can't recall if there was an exact moment when I felt compelled to scribble this : no inciting incident comes to mind. Perhaps I saw an architectural rendering of a "vanishing point" at any rate one thought led to another and at some point led to a pencil.
On one level this looks to tell the story of someone in an art museum giving in to the temptation to touch the artwork. The sense of touch can bring a sense of reality that sight cannot but sometimes what we find does not live up to imagination.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Yeah pretty much a fellow whose fingers give the lie to his eyes. Losing and gaining perspective at.. read moreYeah pretty much a fellow whose fingers give the lie to his eyes. Losing and gaining perspective at the vanishing point. Or something like that. Thanks for reading.
So beautiful indeed. What happens once we explore beyond the lines, beyond the skies limit? What happens when we bend a rule, or not go in uniform? That's when we stand out, and not become another point that needs to vanish, because we are unique and it needs to be looked that way, that we aren't someone else and no one else can be us.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Thank you for reading and for your cogent comment.
Once we've scaled the heights and sailed the vast oceans we come to a point where everything about the unknown, of what's out there is laid bare. We can no longer be innocent or wide-eyed about those things. As children of a single parent we pretty much had to take hold of much of the domestic reigns. One day a younger sister asked rather pointedly, and then retorted, 'You can tell me! I know. But everyone keeps it a secret.' Our loss of innocence was rough in many instances and wondrous at others. So we grieve and mourn and look at the next thing in front of us, less pristine, more knowing. Perhaps this is part of evolving that evolutionists don't always touch on or validate; our inner evolution. But that's just me. Thanks for sharing. /Frederick.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Frederick, thank you for reading and for taking time to comment. I appreciate it. I like your term.. read moreFrederick, thank you for reading and for taking time to comment. I appreciate it. I like your term "inner evolution" your usage makes it distinct from mere growth.
2 Years Ago
Thanks, Delmar, it was difficult to find an apt and already coined term so decided on that. I'm glad.. read moreThanks, Delmar, it was difficult to find an apt and already coined term so decided on that. I'm glad it helped describe what I felt the poem was conveying at some level. Cheers. Frederick.
Hi Delmar, This piece touches many themes. The inner perspective shows how deep from the ethers the ideas come. Blind uniformity, loss of the sublime for the mundane by following in lock step, then touching, coming close to original creativity, only to be pulled back into line, never getting to explore the discovery.
And more. Your few words suggest so much, allowing room for the reader to relate their own experiences. Nice piece.
A cry against the commonplace. A challenge to be daring and to break the mold and venture into something new,untried. It is only in the daring that things are found worthwhile and worth the effort of pursuit. Thank you for the inspiration.
Take care - Dave
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
So glad you read this one. Thanks for your patience.
An excellent poem, Delmar!!! seems wandering the whole process of the canvas of Life, or Love, or Death, or wandering and processing the phases of every single Discovering. seems even speaking about the transcendence and the briefness of each moment ...this feels a very multipurpose poem and its reading opens and sets mind free. lines and rhymes of the poem are soo clever and well structured and well conceived, specially: "Taken in perspective, all lines converge" epic line this yours. Thank u for magically sharing and, indeed as Laz, masterful delivering. :) my humble respect and full admiration, Amber
Posted 3 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
3 Years Ago
Dear Amber,
Thank you for taking the time to read and then comment about the poem. That alo.. read moreDear Amber,
Thank you for taking the time to read and then comment about the poem. That alone is a great pleasure to me, but then the comments are kind and gentle so I am induced to purrr. I like your comment "this feels a very multipurpose poem" so it seems I have written the Swiss Army Knife of poems. My hats are all now too small.
Hey! I'm over here in Walker County, in case you thought you were the only poet in the area. To me, this seems like an homage to rule breakers. To those who see beyond, and break the rules because rules for rules sake are death to the creative mind. As someone who goes out the in door often, and touches wet paint just to see if they are lying to me, I can identify with this. As I often told my children, "Rules are for people who can't think for themselves."
Posted 3 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
3 Years Ago
Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment. Y'all come.