The Finch Pool The storm
was a fact, but.. Later, after the fact, there was talk Talk of
God's larger plan God planned the bird bath in my living room? I wish He'd
planned on bringing it through the door Rather than the ceiling. My father
spoke of larger plans The Big Picture, he called it. On the ship, even on
the landing craft, it was God's plan On the beach? Eisenhower's. I
have no plan at all but to slake the thirst of birds.
I think we all question the exitance of "G-d" at some point in our lives. You have done so showing respect and admiration for some spiritual being great than yourself. Then you mention Eisenhower....surely a reference to D-Day and the invasion of Normandy. The family dynamic is here as well. Very well written and definitely a poem with multiple layers to peel back. Lydi*
I appreciate your comments and thank you for reading. Only the storm was real, as I intimated. The.. read moreI appreciate your comments and thank you for reading. Only the storm was real, as I intimated. The rest was story fitted to theme. My father crossed the channel on a vessel he built in Orange , Texas before he was drafted, but he crossed well after D Day and was being sent on a convoluted route to fight in Italy.
4 Years Ago
vessel he built in Orange?
was he a mechanic?
followed his craft to the theater shores.. read morevessel he built in Orange?
was he a mechanic?
followed his craft to the theater shores?
4 Years Ago
Dad was an 18 year old apprentice blacksmith when he was drafted into the army and away from the shi.. read moreDad was an 18 year old apprentice blacksmith when he was drafted into the army and away from the shipyard of Consolidated Steel in Orange. He crossed the English Channel in a vessel he helped to build there then was trucked , marched, dragged? across Europe to the Italian Campaign which he joined as a replacement right after the fall of Rome.
I like the imagery. The bird bath coming through the roof is a trifle to close to the bone after this last hurricane season but I dig the riff.
The juxtaposition of The Almighty's plans to Ike's tickled me.
Posted 6 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
6 Years Ago
Thanks for reading it. "Poetry" is what I do while I'm waiting for the story bus.
A very interesting poem. I get the tone of doubt while the writer is assured by others that all of this is God's plan. Bringing it around to the bird bath again at the end is interesting. I'm not sure if I get the entire meaning, but I feel that the speaker is comparing his or her feeble and small plans with the large and even destructive plans of God.
Is Eisenhower a reference to Normandy? Is the speaker arguing with the father about whether the landing was God's plan or man's?
Good style. A good poem does keep the reader guessing for a time. Also very effective use of punctuation, enhancing the pacing of the poem.
Posted 6 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
6 Years Ago
Thanks for reading.
Joel Crow asks:
"Is Eisenhower a reference to Normandy? Is the spe.. read moreThanks for reading.
Joel Crow asks:
"Is Eisenhower a reference to Normandy? Is the speaker arguing with the father about whether the landing was God's plan or man's?"
Yes, Dday is the reference. No, there is an assertion but not an argument. The" Big picture" was, of course, warspeak for every man being a small part of a bigger plan. Here that Big Picture is compared to a divine plan.
I love the imagery and the tone of this poem. I really feel like this is a bold statement to the unquestionable plan God always seem to have.
I honestly rate poems based on how it's expressed. From my experience with poetry, there are a myriad of way to do so. Poetry is artistic honesty, colorful truths, beautiful mistakes, a language of blurred lines.
I appreciate it in any narrative, as long as it isn't lifeless words.
Posted 6 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
6 Years Ago
Thank you for your kind words and generous review. I have no pretentions about my "poetry". I writ.. read moreThank you for your kind words and generous review. I have no pretentions about my "poetry". I write some things in poem form, but always consider these forms not to be poems but embryonic stories. If I can write a poetic story that is all right too.
I like this, I think it evokes thoughts we all have about God's larger plan when disasters happen, or wars or ugly things, but we still go on to "slake the thirst of birds" very nice, I like the way the lines flow.
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
We had a pair of storms here a few years ago that rearranged the landscape. this was a response to .. read moreWe had a pair of storms here a few years ago that rearranged the landscape. this was a response to the storms and the neighbors, including the finches.
My silly fellow druid and his talk of heavenly plans. You my friend have vision and don't need one. CD
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
So I have fooled yet another with this illusion of "vision". Pay no attention to the man behind the.. read moreSo I have fooled yet another with this illusion of "vision". Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. I am sending you a read request that deserves your attention.
I guess I'm a bit late on this one, but what a great piece! Destiny is a load. If there is a big picture my will be to small to see it all; I can only digest what my thoughts can conceive. I wonder though if the finches were excited for a new view, i wonder if they sang a new tune.