Inner Sparkle

Not about me, I usually write observing what others are going through

I'm just trying to find my sparkle again
The one I lost
When I thought I was your best friend
My friends always say
I'm not the same
They can read it on my face
Even when I try to hide
I can't avoid the dead give away

I try so hard to fake it through the day
It's so hard to pretend
To have all this supposed strength
But it feels as if everyday of my life to this point
Has wasted away
And for what?
Just to bring a smile to his face?
When it's only my body
He feels is worth anything?

I'm losing my inner smile pretty quick
No wonder it's everyday I feel sick
That the pains shoot through my body
I thought I was just imagining things
When i was self rejecting