Introduction

Criticism would be awesome, thanks :)

I've been thinking for a while now that I'm not cut out for relationships and things like love. See, I'm pretty simple once you get past all the bullshit in my life; I'm content with being alone for days...even weeks. If you don't try to contact me then you should know I'm not going to be the one to step up to the plate. I've been in very few relationships, the first one I was in was with my best friend. We were young and confused about sexuality, it only lasted about a week before we, as 10 year old children, decided we were just best friends. 

To this day we are still best friends. 

She, I believe is my soulmate just not in the romantic way. We have a deeper soul connection than I've ever experienced with anyone in my life. We're calm around each other, we don't need to pretend. We can just sit in silence for hours, watching Netflix and eating random food we find hanging around. 

Now, I'm in my senior year of high school. My final year before I set off to yet another 4 years of learning. I'm in a relationship now but don't get it twisted, I still don't like being in relationships. People get clingy and when you don't talk to them for more than 5 days, they think you're angry or that somethings wrong.

Why does anything have to be wrong?

Why do I have to be angry?

Why can't you just leave me alone for a while?

I know what you're thinking. Why don't you just breakup with him? Because it isn't that simple. I've lost him once, I don't want to lose him again. He's important to me. Yes there are important people in my life. 

People tend to think that I'm to brash, which is fine by me...Whatever keeps people away from me. My family questions why I don't have many friends or why I don't go out and do things but they don't understand the fact that I hate everything about that. Being alone is best.

Love sucks and relationships are just trivial things that I don't have time for. My body can't handle it emotionally or physically. 

This is my story of how I cannot escape these things. How I'm trapped. 

Author's Note

tell me what you guys think. Criticism is wanted.

Reviews

[grayscale heart]

Wow... this is great! For some reason, I thought of Caroline Kepnes's "You" after the first paragraph. I loved the quick and blase voice. I can't put my finger on it, but something slows down in the paragraph that starts with "I'm a romantic at heart..." Almost as if maybe you don't need to explain how "fatigued" the main character is by relationships. I think we get that from her very descriptive, relatable voice. Just a suggestion though. I love this, can't wait to read more!

[DecayingEmbers]

Thanks so much! This is really helpful, I'll be sure to fix what I can and make it better :)