~~ Looking Out ~~

This was inspired by a movie called "August"  with Anthony Hopkins...... the end made me think of this :) Just a little piece.

 

 

Always Looking Out

 

Once there was music... then the music just stopped

Once there was dancing... then the dancing just stopped

Once there was laughter.......

Once sun beat on her face.... then there was only dark

 

Where is the sun?? Where did it all go she asks?

 

But wait....... theres the window... she always 

liked sitting by the.......

 

She sits by the window  never able to leave

her fears keep her there,even in death her

fears keep her there.

Children catch a glimps and wonder what they

see, no one has lived there in ages.

They should be frightend, instead there is

only pity for her eyes are sad as limpid pools

of blue always teaming with tears for a life

never lived.

 

There is nothing more frightening then the pain

of a soul gone yet traped in time

Dont look into her eyes they make the heart beat slower....

so slow you can hear it in the dark beating

till the sound is gone and the life is gone

 

Sitting by the window waiting for resuce 

day after day, year after year watching 

the children play.

Once she had hope with passion .. so much passion

Then everything stopped ...... like the beating 

of her heart , when the lights went out

the only brightness came from the glass pane

calling her to a life with no means to live

 

Deborah Mills Kelly

 

4/10/12

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[emmajoy]

What i call a 'sadness in words', you've quite dramatically painted a wretched scene centred on a tragic figure; the picture goes along with it so well, clever find. The woman's emptiness really does seep out, and, it hurts.

Maybe check for typos, pity to distract from your phrases.

[Debbie_Philly]

Thank you so much Emma... the sadness is what I was trying to get across... Im happy to see you felt that... and THANK you about the typos... Im famous for it... I should learn by now..lol. Thanks again hun !!

[John Stussy]

This sad poem was well written indeed. Your somber tones held throughout illustrated the living ghosts perfectly. I think I shall have to check out the movie that inspired this. I enjoyed the ethereal feel of this piece. Great job Debbie.

[Debbie_Philly]

Thank you so much John.... your words mean allot... Im happy that you enjoyed the piece and let me know how you like the movie :)

[Dr. Wood ?]

wonderful use of words Debbie, Sad yet somehow strangely uplifting...terrific descriptions...a really great write

[Debbie_Philly]

Hey Dr Wood !!! :) Thank you so much..... Im really happy to hear you liked it !! :)

[EileenMarie]

Wow!! Amazing this is amazing! I can relate, fear is crippling...... truthfully I think I see me in this before I left my exhusband!
I love the picture you choose as well.......
Great job!!

[Debbie_Philly]

Thank you so much Eileen... very much appreciated it !! :)

[WindSong]

The poem is filled with such great lines and wonderful imagery! I loved it!

[Debbie_Philly]

Than k you very much for stopping in to read Windsong... I will return the favor .. :)

[Muse]

Wow...what a gorgeous picture to be inspired by...or maybe it was the other way around. No matter, this was a sad but beautiful read. One I can relate to from time to time.....

Thank you for sharing.

Muse

[Debbie_Philly]

Thank you so much Muse.... it mean allot that you came by to read and that you enjoyed it.... looking forward to reading more of you !!!

[Michael X]

passionate and abstract, the reader can feel the emotion and the focus
to the point of hypnotic, of life and longing, desires fleeting, outstanding

[Debbie_Philly]

WOW Michael again thank you so much.... a writer can only hope to invoke such a feeling ... thank you again !!! :)

[Whiskurz]

You are a very talented writer.....Bravo my friend......Whisk

[Debbie_Philly]

Awww Thank you very much.... look forward to reading you... on my way there now .:)

[Debbie_Philly]

Just posted