This space she leaves me in

This sad love poem basically describes one of my more painful relationships. The regrets it left me with just took over my pen and this is what I ended up with.

This space she leaves me in

 

She said

I've never been anywhere as cold as you,
you were my journey and my destination,

shelter and warm embrace,

now all I can find is this frozen tundra of your heart,

 

She said

I've never been anywhere as cold as you,

I touch you and I freeze,
I kiss you and your breath sinks deep inside me,
like cold knives it sinks deep inside me,

you made me love you

and gave me bitterness and loneliness.

Before you I never knew such pain,

I tried to make you see,

I tried till my heart couldn't take the pressure,

until I was on my knees

but nothing could make you love me,

nothing could make you care.

 

She said

I've never been anywhere as cold as you

and all I'd tried to say,

all I felt inside,
my love I could never show,

my feelings I could never articulate,

the tragedy is I love her,

there is no one else who matters more than her

but I'm trapped here deep inside me

responding with these instincts,

responding with my fear.

As she turns to leave me,

a final parting of our ways
a single tear rolls down my cheek,

now she has turned to ice

and I've never been anywhere as cold as this space

she leaves me in.

 

 

Reviews

[Brianna Brie]

This is so sad as it leaves me feeling a heaviness that takes my last bit of energy away. I know this cold place :(

[Justine]

Deacon, I think this is one of the best heartbreaking poems I have read in quite some time. Your opening lines just smack you straight between the eyes while ripping out the guts. So often people tell me "it's all about the journey" and I shriek whenever I hear that, but your line "you were my journey and my destination" is exactly how I see it. Very well written, I can't offer any suggestions other than - more please! :) Justine