The Family

It makes for a curios remark to say that … a woman relates to a man … as mother to teen … and a man to a woman … as father to child. However … if we added to that the comment … that such an experience takes place … in the attitudes … it might make it clearer. Attitudes … represent traits … that are a consistent pattern of behavior … despite the diversity of experiences that we engage. And consistency here … is of course defined … as the most frequently exhibited quality … of the personality … that comes to be displayed.

 

In putting to a test … such a view … we would seek to confirm … the occurrence of such displays of personality … the identifying criteria of teenage and child … the cause for such a personality trait … and to formulate a thesis regarding the male and the female … in their physical condition. In some cases … we are able to affirm such a phenomenon … within the experience of the individual … through a degree of agreement that … reflects what we find contained in the passions.

 

 A woman's view of a man … inclines to that of the physical … the physical strength … the manner of physical expression … and the roughshod manner of emotions. We are certainly distant from the days of the hunter gatherers … when the man's role … was simply to hunt and provide for the family. But in these times … we find the man's physical aspect … as contributing to the woman's … nature of the subtle passions … in which he is the tool that stimulates these into expression.

 

In a man … the subtle passions … act as a moderating influence … on his physical natures … and makes him cognizant of the social natures. He attributes that to society in general … but finds a specific relation to the … nature of the child within. And  in doing so … the man finds the magical nature of the child's broad range of emotions … its unmindful nature … and its tendency to believe in all possibilities … that he guides into an experience … of the physical.

 

We are all no doubt entirely familiar with how this can go wrong … and find the woeful expressions of regret … that puts this into a mouthful. But even in such dire conditions of view … we can start to heal it … by viewing the two poles of teenage and child … as viewed by the woman and man … respectively. It provides for a place to gather … the positive aspects of the relations … between the two … and to gradually build on it.

 

 The woman's relation to the teen … is the grand ageless quality of youth … her excitability … quick wit … and the manner of drawing on numerous avenues of responses to any situation. And at the point at which she meets her love interest … her expressions of her personality … are the very thing that seals … the bond they come to form with each other. But with age … the responsibilities of child bearing … financial successes … social standing … turns her man into a pillar of automated responses … that no longer relates to her as a person.

 

Certainly the male response … appears to rely on his concerns for … the security of the family … his role as bread winner … and doing the right thing. And right there … we hear the echoes of … Neanderthal! … vibrating through the halls … of the new age … in which we seem to think … we can do more to improve that. It draws the man … into decision making … that pits the prospect of financial success … with the stability of the family … and the way we think we can have both.

 

I seem to recall that my decision making on the issue … sought to find a homemaker as wife … and so I had been inclined to think that … someone without a college degree … would fulfill that role. My income rose to a level … that was four times … what she earned … and it engaged us in growing into a life of middle class comfort … that was simply a part of the norm. I thought I had continued to preserve the teen personality … and my inquiries at this time … center on the way … the ex-wife … continued to preserve her child nature.

 

The way I came to observe her growth … indicated a resistance to being viewed as child. She was taking into a more matronly role … and preparing the ground for me to … fill the role of bread winner extraordinaire … and a pillar of society … with the relatives. That didn't work with me. I didn't think my personality … ought to be a pillar of anything. I was just happy being myself … and was doing great in my career … in the way I applied myself with a balance on all issues.

 

These days … I relate myself to the child again … and find in the experience … the very origin of life. Had we stayed together … I wonder how I would have related to her personality … the way … I relate to the extensions of the child quality … as the world … and creation itself. Would we have come to view ourselves … as the two parts of life … one part progeny … the other human … and found a way to express that in our relations?

 

There's no doubt we both had much growing to do … in the manifested nature of experiences. If there's one thing I can point to as … in need of improvement … it would be in the nature of the child's communication … in the relations. It had insisted on expressing itself … in speech … the way songs and poetry … may convey themselves … as communication. But beyond the songs … there's the intimations of… body language … cues … hints … and symbols … that would have made for a greater response.

 

A child that is experiencing growth into his teens … is often in the habit of being in great haste to do so. The prospect of hair on face … or the use of cosmetics … is a strong draw. Its a quality that carries into adulthood … and expresses itself in all manner of contrivances and defenses … to express its grown up condition. We could do more to moderate that … in our reviews of the experience. As we bring our minds … to create cognition of  the unspoken cues and hints of the passions … we find in it … a true source of expression … and relation to life.