The Lone Universe

The Wisdom of Abner Day - III

The universe is one of its kind … and as far as Abner knew … there wasn't another like it. Therefore in reviewing the will and intent of the universe … a man is obliged to engage it as himself … in that incredible sense of ' I .' All our understanding is therefore … designed as such … whether we did it ourselves … or was done for us … by the design of time. And so it occurred to Abner … that he didn't know why … he wanted to climb the hill nearby … but he did.  He'd been walking in the woods daily … for about a month … and when he was ready … he took off.

 

Called Amphitheater mountain … on account of the big gorge on one side … the hill was to Abner … a bigger than life neighbor. He had expected … that it would help him build a vista … of the surroundings … as far as the eye can see. In that he had hoped … to create a ' terra '(*1) … a duplicate of the world … that would be his world. So … one fine morning … he brought food … and camping equipment … and began a paced walk … to the hill. He had discovered during his training … that the best speed … for the climb … was based on his continued sense of enthusiasm … about what he was doing.

 

He wondered about the vision he had seen of the brown and green trees on the hill. It reminded him … of the time … he had his lens changed at the optician. It used to be brown color coated … but in changing the left lens … the optician had substituted it with a blue coated lens. Abner didn't notice it … until he got home … and then decided it didn't make much difference. It occurred to him suddenly … that a woman's bra has always been one color … never two. And then … taken back by the thought … he realized with a smile … that he had always been competing … with the ex-wife.

 

 But for now … it was a clear morning … the sun was just over the horizon … and the sky had streaks of bright orange against a lightening dark blue. As he passed the lake … that reflected the mountain … in the view from his cabin … he was mildly disappointed … that it wasn't there at close view. Curious … he thought … that he was disappointed at that. ' Objects in the mirror are closer than they seem ' … he muttered dryly … as he pressed on. The hill had taken a looming effect as he approached … and he realized … it was going to change what he thought of it … these past few years. ' Not you too ' … he said in mock disappointment.

 

He was in high spirits … as if he was doing something … that he would have wanted all along. After about one-and-a-half hours … he was at the foot … and he stopped to rest on a rock. He took a gulp of coffee … and rolled a cigarette. Lighting it up … he went over in his mind … the topography of the hill … from the maps on the web. The amphitheater gorge was on the south face. He had to move around to the north side … where climbing would be easier. No ropes or scaling equipment … he figured it'll be a trek … with some crawling up slopes.

 

It occurred to him … as he made his way … to the north side … that he already had a picture of what he would see from the top. It was clear from the maps on the web … satellite photos … Google earth … and the stunning pictures he had seen … on the outfitter sites … tourists … blogs and Youtube. Did he want something special from an actual climb and view? He wondered about that. The only difference … would be his physical effort … and where that formed a bias … he feared it'll compete … with what he knew about ' terra ' … from the web … a case of the mind and body in overlapping each other … in double vision.

 

Two hours later … he was on the north side … and based on his study of the topography … picked the spot … where the slopes would be gentlest … barring any gorges or large rocks. As he ascended … he used the cedar branch … he carried as a walking stick … to balance his weight … and maintained a steady pace. ' Only if it continues to be fun ' … he reminded himself … ' I'm prepared to stop at anytime ' … ' its not a problem.' Its a habit he'd picked up … since coming to Alaska. He'll talk to himself … as mind to body ... giving encouragement … and support.

 

The climb wasn't half bad … but he was coming into contact … with an old part of his passions … in which he had identified with the land of his birth … and the location he was born to. It had been him … the scenery … mountains … rivers … trees … and the people. But something in the experience(*2) … turned over like an apple cart … and caused him anguish … in the deepest part of his self identity. As he moved on the slopes … the feeling of the break came back … and suddenly he was very tired.

 

He stopped … almost out of breath … and felt a deep sense of rejection … by … the earth … his creator … God … his former society … call it as you will. Its on account of that … that he had been establishing a new relation to the location … in Alaska. To establish his ' terra '  … was to find himself again. It was a relative identity (*3) … provincial … but in every provincial experience … was the world … if we know where to look. It appeared to him … that he had relied on his ex-wife … for an affirmation of the experience … but there was obviously a clash of wills … about what that meant.

 

He saw how … he had created an over mind of his experience … in his former town. It was part dream … in relation to his sense of belonging … to the earth. But he had tried to rework it … when he got married … but it was too late. He was building on the dream … and it had a long reach to a super achievement … that he was never quite sure about. It felt nice … to come to understand that about himself. He lifted his head slightly to the sky and said … ' thank you … I appreciate it.'

 

The experience moved him … and he took off his backpack … stood silently … and repeated the lord's prayer from Mathew. Then he sat on the ground … and composed himself … with the heaving passions. He figured he was being given a chance … to make good … his relations to the earth. It must mean … he's not going to the top. Perhaps … he'll climb halfway up. He had been presumptuous about a lot of things … and had claimed that it wasn't his fault … but he was starting to understand it better now.

 

All of a sudden … he felt again the rush of appeal … that had dogged him all his life to-date. It was the same plaintive appeal … to achieve … to drive on (*4) … to reach the top. ' I 'm sorry ' … he said out loud … this is the best I can do ' and then after a pause added … ' find someone who'll do it for you … I'm not the one.' The words came easily … with the sensation … that his life had come full circle … and he saw clearly what he was. ' Someone will come in the future ' … he added … ' he'll continue with the work … I'm done.'

 

' A thing is achieved in the way its perceived to be achieved ' … he continued. He made preparations to camp there that night. In the morning he'll decide how far he wants to go. So he pitched his tent … and had a fire going. As he was heating up the food … he realized the irony he was in. He came to Alaska to be free … but he's camping out … because he can't achieve what he wants even in the house … he built with his bare hands. He saw in his mind … his bias for doing things because he was in a dream … but in the expression of actual physical achievement … a man relies on a manner of declaring how that is an achievement. Anything else is to drive the physical up the hill of the dream.

 

 

 

Abner's Collection of Useful Words :

 

 

(*1) terra … (Pron' /tear ra ) (Orig. latin … terra firma) Old appellation for earth. Lexicon … the source of the meaning lies in ' firm ground ' and is based in relation to the mindset of man in the renaissance. Early cartographers engaged the term to describe their drawings of world maps. Myth (Indic) similar naming conventions referred to the earth as Booma Devi … a goddess.

 

(*2)  something ( in the experience ) … ( Pron' /sum … ting) An object, event or any unnamed factor that acts as a stimulus but is as yet not fully understood. Lit.... frequent references to the fates, destiny and so forth. Historical …  In western cultures references to the Cimmerian experience of hyperborean that is a withdrawal of man to the temperate regions. Legends … References to Hyperion in the constellations as the father of Helios. The word ‘ hyper ‘ is an indication of hyper activity.

 

(*3) relative ( identity ) … (Pron' /rare .. le … thief ) a person or persons associated with an individual on account of family … or family relations. Science … an object that influences the action of another object in a defined parameter. Abner's version … bloodsuckers. Lexicon … a group identity involving role play and common objectives in which the meanings of words and innuendos are sometimes only true in their application in that group … not universally.

 

(*4)  drive (on) … (Pron' / dry … if ) (Origin American … keep on goin') To keep moving without abatement of force.  Unexplained (from the Post Office) … The voices drove me to it. Feminine … A speech pattern that is highly influenced by shock, wonder or excitation that's combined with the anxiety of discovery. Twilight Zone … Its the next stop. Abner's version … Nuts. Intellect … silly playing about on account of things being simple but considered difficult by others.

 

 

Reviews

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that was very great and the title was attractive, well done