The Iceman Cometh*

A barbaric yes man

As far as I can tell … a man shares his thoughts with his feelings. We notice … in the relation … a distinct sense … of looking out for number One. It makes for an awkward sense of feel … about what that is … when we realize … that the passions … are moving with as much savvy … as the intellectual orientation … of the mind. Its uncomfortable … and it feels out of place … but what is it? Is it normal?

I suppose … we think the emotion … should display … greater caring … and not be … in that way … as sharp as the mind … in our daily purposes. We fear the loss of love … trust … and a real sense of feeling. Many a man … who's intelligent wonders about that … and wanes in the face … of the thought that … if everyone is this way … what's to become of our family life. Isn't it sometimes nice to make mistakes … grief over it … and truly express … a sense of care? Isn't 8that human?

I had an anxiety about that in my youth … and thought perhaps I was somewhat flawed in my personality. I thought perhaps … my feelings for women … developed from that experience. They're so natural … and they'll cry when they need to … feel embarrassed … or worry about something. I … on the other hand … was carried on the shoulder of angels … and was in a way … impeccable. Sadly … as I grew up … I realized that I had become the very … hall of male chauvinism … women refer to as pigs.

Okay … I guess I'm saying it now. I was secretly wishing for a little more compassion … mercy … and love in my life. Really! I was watching movies … where the hero realizes … he needs to think … with the same viciousness … as the urban terrorist he is pursuing … but he screws up. Why? He says it in the movie … ' not tough enough.' And right there … I started to feel … that he's a better man than me.

Its a wonderful attitude … great mannerisms … and no doubt … the gals … love a guy like that. So what is making everybody these days … say that its a load of crap? It could be the promises we encounter … for the development of human possibilities. We encounter training programs … practical development guides … self management … work out routines … cosmetic and fashion advertising … that's always … persuading us … that we can be more.

Mass education … in these times … has made it possible … for anybody to get a degree. Management science … has evolved over a 100 year period … to prove itself capable of getting results. An MBA … becomes a much sought after prize … for any potential manager. And our dreams have grown … to say … ' if one man can achieve it so can another.' You just have to dream it … and you can be it.

In the way it creates an appeal to the individual … it coaxes the man … to give it a try. Some of us … pause to think about it … and realize that its on the tail … of the YUPPIE … and our first instinct is to say … ' that's not me.' Others get thrown into the melee … and enter a ' sink or float ' situation … in which they create some response to the situation … and emerge … in some way … as a person who took risks … compared to us … the chopped liver … living the poor but honestly chauvinistic life.

There's a subtle difference … between understanding … what we are … and being more … and its what makes the difference … in succeeding or failing. How do we try to be more … without understanding what we are? How do we know where we are going … without understanding where … we came from? How does anyone do anything … without understanding … what their needs are?

At the risk … of turning this into a Sunday morning sermon … I wish to simply point to the fact … that we are … each one … a breathing … thinking person … who can … if he applies himself … to discover … where he's coming from … what his needs are today … and where he wants to go with it. For some folks … to admit that they have a need … is to admit to dependency … failure … because … '  I ought to have known that already.'

We sometimes hear our father say … ' shelf it ' … and ' get on with what you have to do. ' And by that … I mean … our innate intelligence … is a phenomenon of the world … and time. It may come and go … with events ... ' Some men have greatness thrust upon them.' The Mauryas … Guptas … the Romans … the Brits … all thought in their time … that they were possessed of an ability to know … that was God given. Then we found out better. Today … that gift may be with the gypsies … on account of their wandering ways … who work it another way.

There is one who knows … and is a friend … but the person is so f*****g professional … it'll take us until the week after next … to understand what the person says sometimes. And I'm not kidding either! It helps to do a review … from time to time … we call it contemplation … in the conventional speech … and such a man … comes to understand … who that friend is … and perhaps even give it a name. From there … your personal friend introduces you to an exclusive club … of people … who understand the world … a certain way.

The Freemasons … the Knights of the Order … the Rosicurians … the Benedictine monks … the Sadhus … the Shite … the wiccan … the tribal natives … the Crowleys … the Iceman and a host of others … create a subscription … to a specific view … which they come to hold as a truth discovered … about their lives. In time … it might be possible … to bring it all together … to represent a one world view … that's our life today.

*Note : … pronounced ' ayesman '