Image Struck

Image Struck

A Poem by Daydreaming

This beauty is burned into my memory,
it seems almost impossible to escape this reverie.

You smile something so abiding,
chasing your ghostly image, this pen slowly guiding.

You never look back, there's no question.
I'm no longer one that holds your affection.


Left with images and clips of a happy life,
no longer comfortable I try to resist the strife.

The sound of the distant footsteps echo,
Pill after pill forcing me to let go.

Moving on and trying something new,
all of these things, they remind me of you.

You continue to smile, laugh and be so bright.
I'll try to forget you, struggling to show my might.

This pen, that pen and all the others.
No matter the shape, size nor colors.
It's your face that shows, no smothers.

The paint may drip and the color may fade,
but this canvas is the only thing coming to aid.

Perhaps a bit brighter, a change here, a new color there.
How many changes, until I receive your stare.

The hours they pass, the weeks only pile.
Slowly increasing this distance, you move by the mile.

I change the shape, I splash the colors 
No matter my effort, I draw no others.

'Til the last drop of ink I scatter,
Your increasingly distant image, my heart only shatters.


 


© 2016 Daydreaming


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Featured Review

What a beautiful piece of writing. Your style is very unique, with the two lines then the next. It's a signature, really. As an artist I love the lines about painting and the frequent message of an ink pen. I can almost picture what's happening. Amazing job.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This is prefect and very relateable.One of the amazing piece I have ever read.
Thank You for sharing this with me:)!

Posted 8 Years Ago


I enjoyed the journey in your words.
"'Til the last drop of ink I scatter,
Your increasingly distant image, my heart only shatters."
I like the flow of thoughts leading to the strong ending. Broken heart will scatter into a thousand pieces. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote



Posted 8 Years Ago


Very beautiful poem. I really like the style of writing you have put. Very unique

Posted 8 Years Ago


You are limited by structure... and your structure feels forced. So, it doesn't really work.

You sound cheesy because of that in this poem.

I'd re write with free form in mind.

Posted 8 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Daydreaming

8 Years Ago

Being limited by structure to you, is a style of writing for others.
Davidgeo

8 Years Ago

Aww... thin skin? Ha. I thought my review was constructive. You ask for others point of view, don.. read more
What a beautiful piece of writing. Your style is very unique, with the two lines then the next. It's a signature, really. As an artist I love the lines about painting and the frequent message of an ink pen. I can almost picture what's happening. Amazing job.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very well written. The idea of paint and ink is interesting.

Posted 8 Years Ago


You let this pour out...never stops from start to finish...as the reader the feelings are struck with each line and finally just explode in the ending...thanks for sharing this work...

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

When the heart surrenders to someone and then that someone chooses to leave, the mind becomes possessed with the memory of the beloved who the heart can't let go of. Well done.

Posted 8 Years Ago


This pen, that pen and all the others.
No matter the shape, size or colors.
It's your face that shows, no smothers.
Love these lines. Haunting memories can drive a person mad, I have been there more often than I'd like to admit. The flow of the rhyme seems a bit forced on some lines but your image never falters.I really enjoy this one


Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A.marie.speaks

8 Years Ago

The rewrite is much more clear. Love the changes and the ending is spectacular! Gave me goosebumps.
Daydreaming

8 Years Ago

Thanks so much, this is actually a collaboration piece with a close friend. He draws such amazing po.. read more
A.marie.speaks

8 Years Ago

Oh wow. Well you captured the feelings perfectly! In my opinion at least
amazing, gorgeous, and beautiful, i am speechless

Posted 8 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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559 Views
12 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on March 3, 2016
Last Updated on March 15, 2016

Author

Daydreaming
Daydreaming

New York City, NY



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