Not yet a thought

Laura turns 16 and starts having dreams of a child that she won't have for another nine years.

Playlist:

"Shifting" by Collide

"Frozen" by Collide

"Halo[Sensory Gate Aura Mix]" by Collide

"Bleed" by The Dreaming {Laura's theme}

"Shine" by Twisted Method

"Bat County" by Avenged Sevenfold {Steve's theme}

 

 

"Daddy, why don't I have a mommy?" A silver eyed boy was laying in the grass and looking up at a clear sky. Next to him was a man who had obvious Mexican features and shared a few of them with the boy. The man blinked and looked over at his son. "She died giving birth to you. Your twin sister died as well."

Laura Lou woke up and looked around. It was raining outside. The chill of September unfurled under her blankets as she moved and she gave a small shiver. Outside of her room, an alarm clock rang through the hall and ended just as soon as it started. Checking her own clock, Laura licked her lips. Today was her sixteenth birthday.

The dream tickled her thoughts. The boy and man were obviously father and son. She didn't know any Mexican's and hadn't seen any movies with Mexican's in them recently. It didn't make sense that she would have a dream with two of them in it. The man was only slightly attractive and a few years older than what she would happily have in a boyfriend. The boy must have a non-Mexican mother to be born with silver eyes.

"Laura! Breakfast is ready!" Laura's older brother Matt yelled up the stairs. Laura wrinkled her nose for a second before opening the door and almost running into her younger half-brother. Jake looked down at her before bolting for the bathroom and locking the door behind him.

"JAKOB!" Laura was hot on his heals, "IT'S MY SIXTEENTH BIRTHDAY, LET ME USE THE SHOWER FIRST FOR ONCE!" she pounded on the door before giving up as Jake laughed.

"Laura, don't let it get to you, sweetie." Matt was looking up the stairs. "Come on, I made your favorite, lime scones with strawberry sauce." Laura looked down at him and quickly ran down the stairs to skip into the kitchen.

A few minutes later, Jake sashayed into the kitchen and picked up a scone. Laura looked up from the textbook she was reading and stuck her tonuge at him. "You better not have used all the hot water or I am going to kick your a*s after swim practice today." She stood up to take her shower. Her dream had all but fled her mind.

 

At school, Laura passed a tiny, gently tanned skin girl on the way to her locker that triggered the somewhat crystal clear memory of her dream. She saw her friend Steve poking through his locker right across from hers. "Hey, Steve, do you know any Mexican guys who are in their twenties?"

Steve slammed the door shut. "Oh, you were looking for a Mexican pediofile for your birthday? Damn it, that was top of my list, but I couldn't figure out how to wrap one up." He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a palm sized gift. "This was second on my list, hope you like it." At that, he patted the top of her head and disappeared into the crowd of students swarming around the lockers.

Laura looked down at her hand where Steve had placed her gift. It was warm from his pocket and Laura wondered if she should open it now or wait until after school when Steve and a few other friends came over for the small party she was having. Steve had given her the gift now, so he probably wanted her to open it now. She slowly unwrapped it to reveal a small envelope, which was open and looking instead, Laura saw that there was a small ring. Pulling it out she felt tears choke her throat.

Steve's parents and her parents had been friends long before Steve and Laura had been born. All four parents had died in the same car crash. The ring that Steve had given her was the same that both Laura's mother and Steve's mother had always worn. Her mother's ring had melted in the crash, but Steve's had survived without a scratch. For as long as Laura could remember, Steve had worn that ring on a chain that had belonged to his father. Giving the ring to her was something beautiful. She put it on her finger and felt the tears threat to spill over; it was a perfect fit.

 

After school, Laura headed down to the pool. It was a nice practice and she let her thoughts wander most of it. None of her teammates said happy birthday, but when she was leaving, her coach commented on the ring. "Hey there, Lou, nice ring. What is that, smoky quartz and emerald on tungstan? Interesting." Coach Kepler was one of the science teachers at school, so it was no suprised to Laura that she knew exactly what encircled Lauras right index finger. "Yeah, it belonged to a friend of my mother's. The friend's son gave it to me for my birthday."

"Ah, happy birthday. Take care and have a great evening... Hey, would you like to swim the 500 at the next meet? Your getting better at long distance and I think you might like to try it this year."

Laura smiled. "I've been waiting for that. Kept wishing for it last year, and tried not to think about earlier this season, but it would be great. Just let me ask around for a counter. Finally, doing something other than looking at the ceiling!" Laura pushed one of the doors to leave the pool and heard Coach Kelper call behind her, "Hey, if 200 back was a high school event and not just part of College Events or club, thats all you would be doing!"

 

"Where did you get this?" Matt grabbed Laura's hand the second he saw her. "It looks like moms, but hers was destroyed." He looked into her face, "Did Steve give this to you?"

"Yeah, he said it was his second choice of a gift for me, but I think that whole thing was a small joke he came up with... What is it, Matt?"

Matt was rubbing his eyes. "I guess Steve is finally coming to terms to what happened. Strange that it took twelve years. Well, actually, not all that strange, but it's just weird."

Laura felt her hands clench. "You don't need to remind me. Where's Jake? Are we meeting him there or is he not going this year?"

"He decided not to go this year. Go change if you want and then we'll get going." Laura spun on her heel to march up the stairs. Matt's voice stopped her before he took a step. "You need to remember that it wasn't your fault, little sister."

Laura's hands tensed even more. "They were coming to get Steve and I. How can I ever think that it wasn't my fault?"

 

At the cemetary, Matt helped Laura out of the car. She saw Steve standing by himself, holding a bouquet of white roses at his side, already at the grave site. He looked over at her and the humor that had been in his eyes that morning was gone. Laura stared at him and for a moment she could see him as the man he would grow up to be. With his brown hair that he occasionally streaked with silver highlights, and ocean blue eyes, Steve could be considered handsome. His tall and proud height with an athletic figure only added to it. But Steve was practically family, a brother living outside of the house. Laura found herself wondering how Steve's life experiences had changed him. Would he be happy in life or had his parents deathes affected him so deeply that he would want nothing to do with the world after high school?

Matt gently pulled her towards Steve and she looked down at the four graves next to each other. Different birthdates, all the same death dates.

 

"Hey, Ashley gave a call. She can't make it, has some big bio test to study for tommorow." Jake leaned into Laura's room as she debated between two shirts to wear. "I would go with the teal one. Brings out that green in your eyes."

Laura threw the other shirt, a black turtleneck, at him, "get out of my room, you half bi fashion magazine!"

Jake grabbed the shirt and sucked his lips in, "girl, I wouldn't wear this in all the world. It's like, too tight for my chest area, and all the guys would go, like, crazy over me. It's just... well, you know." He stuck out his tongue and dropped the shirt before vanishing into his own room.

Laura pulled on the shirt and ran downstairs. Steve and Matt were in the kitchen, quietly chatting when she popped her head in. "How goes things, boys?"

Matt looked behind him, where a small mountain of food was piled up. "Steve and I have gotten everything taken care of. All you have to do is smile and play nice with the other puppies."

Laura put on her best smile for the small group of people that showed up. Some of them wore black and looked at her teal shirt with scrutiny. Happened every year, which was why she always had a party, to show people that she wasn't going to mope around, that she knew that death was a part of life, and that though she was an orphan, she still had a life to lead, parents or not.

 

"Daddy, why do we swim so much?" The same boy from the previous night was sitting at the edge of a pool, dipping his toe into the water, watching the ripples move out into the body of water. His father was behind him, gently holding him so he wouldn't fall in. "We swim because mommy loved to swim and I know she would love that you know how to."

The boy smiled up at his dad. "Mommy swam?"

The man gave a small smile and looked up. "Yes, she did."