Whispering Walls

The place was a crumbling ruin,

It sat on the top of a hill,

If we hadn’t been travelling tired that day

We may have been travelling still,

But you said we ought to seek shelter there

From a sudden deluge of rain,

So I parked outside its terraces

And entered the palace of pain.

You were the first to say ‘It’s strange,

The feeling within these halls,’

While all I could hear were the scraping sounds

That came from the whispering walls.

It must have been long deserted, it

Was just like a pile of bones,

That someone left when its throat was cleft

And lay fading into its moans.

The night came down with a vengeance once

We’d made our camp on the floor,

And rain poured in at the windows that

Were probably there before,

You said we’d leave when the morning came

Once the sun was up, and bright,

We didn’t know that an age of shame

Wrapped that place in an endless night.

I tried to sleep but you’d wake me up

Each time that I dropped my head,

‘Didn’t you hear that dreadful scream?’

I seem to remember you said.

But all I heard were the awful groans

That echoed around the halls,

I couldn’t explain the sense of dread

That came from the whispering walls.

I thought that the rain poured down on us

I thought that we lay in mud,

I lit a match in the early hours

To see you covered in blood.

I said, ‘We’d better go back to sleep

Till the nightmare hour is past,

But then you noticed the blood on me

And you screamed, and lay aghast.

I wish that we’d never gone near the place

I wish we’d stayed in the car,

Then you’d still be who you used to be

And I would know where you are!

But you ran screaming into the night

When they came with their hoods and gowns,

With their bloodied hands and their burning brands

To burn the place to the ground.

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[R Smith]

lovely creepy, scary, flesh tingling horror, you do this so brilliantly David, it's a fireside story in the dark of the night, a group of friends gather and tell ghostly tales to scare each other witless, my perfect night in if only, it would be glorious I think and I'm sure a whole bunch of those tales would be yours, wonderful writing as always :)

[A Soap Mess Stories]

gruesome. . .yet filled with an air of mystery. . .a great campfire tale. . .

[Valentine]

Woo...gruesome. I loved the last 2 or 3 lines of each segment. This is written very well and holds ones interest. Nice job Mate. Valentine

[Breanna Riddle]

Yet again an amazing write! I love it when you write horror stories like this with your poems. You never fail to paint a very vivid scene with your words. I loved this so much!

[Coyote Poetry]

A powerful tale told. I had to read again. You create situation of mystery with a very sad ending. I liked how you used the description. Made the story in the poem come alive. Thank you David for sharing the outstanding poetry and tale.
Coyote

[richieb]

Excellent horror imagery. Your story starts slowly errie and continues to become more vivid and uncomfortably creepy. It gets bloody and then you think it has reached its cresendo and will start finding a normal path. But no, more violence around the corner. Why not! Richie B.

[M. L. F.]

Oooh.... I love creepy.... love, love, love a good creepy write! This one is really cool David. ;)

[andrew mitchell]

unique!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Avinash]

We sometimes just delve into ominous places unknowingly. These are the moments when we have to trust our instincts more than anything else. I will be careful in going to strange places after reading this for sure.

[Philip Muls]

I enjoyed this very much David.

You are a master in creating a very specific mood. In this case, you are very effective in making the reader feel the supernatural doom and despair that is dominating this 'palace of pain'.

Ver well done.